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Show Page A10 Thursday. December 16. 1982 Park City News Honda HS-50T Snow Blower Unique track type drive system for positive traction even on steep grades 1 Easy starting 5 hp Honda 4-stroke engine with cast iron cylinder sleeve for durability. Clears a 21.7 inch path Throws snow up to 43 ft. 1 Capacity 21 tonhr. 200 directional chute 3 forward speeds, 1 rev. MM ffllS TRACKS F$L traction HS-50T OPEN: 8-6MON.-FRI. 8-4 SATURDAY LAY AWAY 3592 So. 900 East - Salt Lake City. Utah 8-1106 - 262-1266 0'v engine Tickets going fast for 'Opening Night '83' Broadway Tony award-winner award-winner Hal Linden, Chef Hussen of the Air France and Concorde and Shearson American Express are all donating their time and talents and financial support to put on "Opening Night '83," the gala New Year's Eve celebration for the Egyptian Theatre in Park City. Part-time Parkite Hal Linden will join the troupe of Park City Performances to present a fast-paced revue for New Year's Eve. They will be backed by the romantic sounds of Jerry Floor's orchestra at the Park City Ski Area beginning at Pay 5 THE I ORDER TAX REFUND U.S. TREASURY DEPT. INTERNAL REVENUE SERVICE SIXTY-THREE THOUSAND FOUR HUNDRED A. Smart Investor N2 1004 M O o N T Figure taken from Price Waterhouse Review assuming 50 tax bracket. 63,40000 NOT NEGOTIABLE O - V.BM '". ;W'"I W Price Waterhouse has reviewed our 4 to 1 Write-Off Program on our Chatham Condominiums. Copies are available. Examine the benefits of our 4 to 1 Write-Off Program! 1. $1,000.00 down payment if bought December 1982. 2. After tax return up to 668. 3. Purchase price rebate if unit doesn't appreciate in value. 4. Investment and shelter secured by a luxury condominium at approximately $85 per sq. ft. For further details contact Mansell and Associates 649-1602, 800-453-3894 or (SLC) 328-1335. Tim Vaughan-Chatham Condominiums Project Manager. Drop by our model today for a tour and explanation of the program TURN LEFT AT THE HOLIDAY INN, FOLLOW THE SIGNS TO CHATHAM. OPENING FRIDAY DEC. 17th ' CHRISTMAS SALE Nocona Python Boots Tony Lama Calf with Lizard Wingtip Europa Sports Men's Leather Bomber Jacket Reg $280 N$180 -$153 No$99 Rea$240 M$180 Reg Philippe Monet Ladies Leather Down Vest $160 . $--() BOOTS Lucchese Tony Lama Nocona Justin Larry Mahan Dan Post Dingo HATS Biltmore Stetson Resistol LEATHER Philippe Monet Europa Sport Char Designs Remmington West TrrK'.v.i IVhadd'ya Know? Iiv Hick llroiigli 8:30 p.m. on Dec. 31. Ogden Foods is flying the famed Chef Hussen to prepare the elegant supper. And finally Shearson-American Express is hiring Fireworks West to produce a show to ring in the new year. The event offers an elegant ele-gant meal, dancing, a nightclub night-club show and your final fi-nal chance to make a tax-deductable tax-deductable donation to the Egyptian Theatre in 1982. Tickets are $65 per person, and limited to the first 300 persons. With the reservation reserva-tion list now at 185, tickets are going fast. To reserve your tickets, call the Egyptian Egyp-tian at 649-9371. Christmas inusic, like the smog in a temperature inversion, is everywhere in the stores, schools, and naturally on the local radio. KFCW is eager to join in the spirit of the holiday, but Blair "Bah Humbug" Feulner worries that his D.J.'s may OD on Christmas carols. "Whaddyaknow" has met with City Planner Bill Ligety. and we have come forth vvith a set of Christmas Music Guidelines that can be used in future years. These have been prepared at a modest cost of $186,000, in collaboration with the Aspen consulting firm of Downing-Leach-Donner-Blitzen. A public hearing on these standards will be held Sunday morning at 3 a.m. "We urge the public to turn out for this hearing," said Ligety. "We're going to have a couple of elves and maybe even one sprite present to explain the guidelines." The classifications of music fall into roughly three areas: PERMITTED: The station can play any version of "White Christmas" (except for those cases noted below). Any work by Bing Crosby or Guy Lombardo will be permitted. We asked Ligety if this did not give a wide latitude to these two artists. He replied, "The staff feels that since both gentlemen have been dead for about five years, we know what to expect from this ordinance." However, Christmas Commissioner Burnis Watts warned, "You're letting yourself in for a flood of Crosby imitators and bad Big Band music." Other permitted uses include any Yuletide standard (defined as any song you would hear over the Muzak system at ZCMD; any religious chant, hymn, mass, or dirge sung by a choral group of at least 35 people; Elvis Presley's version of "Blue Christmas;" and, of course, the Chipmunks' recording of "Christmas, Don't Be Late." CONDITIONAL: City approval must be given to any rock star doing a Christmas song at least 50 years older than he is. Local government will give close review to any version of Handel's "Messiah" broadcast in Dolby stereo, lest this endanger the health of senior citizens. Finally, any song using the lyric, "I'd like to buy the world some Coke," must make it clear that the reference is to a carbonated beverage. These conditional uses must be submitted to the Historic Music Commission. According to proposed ordinance, one musicologist, and one Park City resident with rosy cheeks and a stomach like a bowlful of jelly. PROHIBITIONS: Anything by Olivia Newton-John, Slim Whitman, people with accordions, Kiss, the Ray Conniff Singers. Also, any recording of dogs barking to the tune of "Jingle Bells." THINGS COULD BE WORSE IN PARK CITY DEPT.: A newspaper from another famous ski town (which shall be nameless) reported that one of its local city councilmen was "arrested for safekeeping" after he was found to be too drunk to drive home. The city official reportedly abused local police and threatened to have them fired. According to the report, the councilman pulled up to the cashier's booth at a local parking area, but did not have the $1.50 he owed, and was not allowed to pay with his American Express Card. He was finally persuaded to back his car away from the booth, but ran over several traffic cones in the process. Police said the official failed the usual sobriety tests. The councilman refused to be driven home, so the constables handcuffed him and took him to the local police department. At the time, the councilman said his arrest was retribution for announced cuts in cost-of-living raises for city employees. First Amendment: What First Amendment? Amend-ment? The papers in recent weeks have carried several items about the role of religion in public life. In Okalhoma City, four students say they have been taunted as devil-worshippers because they do not participate in prayer services sponsored by the school. The two mothers of the children have filed suit in federal district court to stop the practice. The Associated Press reports a milder dispute in Glenview, Illinois, where enviorn-mentalists enviorn-mentalists are opposing a Mormon temple planned for a site adjacent to a nature preserve. Neighbors say the nature area will be harmed by the fumes of heavy auto traffic pouring in and out of the church lot. Another conservationist complained the temple would be the size of a football field. Lastly, the Cold War between religion and secular society heated up in Dandridge, Tennessee, after four Baptist-college students stu-dents burned down a house where they found Playboy and Penthouse magazines. The house owner wanted to prosecute the kids on a felony. "Miss July is hardly a reason to set a house on fire," he said. But a local judge reduced the charges to misdemeanor, prompting one attorney to say the juirist had "the wisdom of King Solomon." Word comes from Hollywood that a major feature film will begin production, based on the recipe book written by KPCW's popular chef of the airwaves, T. T. Tillie. In the wake of "E.T., the Extra-Terres-trial," the new film will be called "T.T., the Extra-Cholesterol." In the story, T.T. receives an urgent last-minute request to prepare a lemon quiche. But she finds herself stranded in Park City in the middle of the night, with nothing open except the 7-11, and must desperately scrounge to put the dish together. Rumour says that various guest stars-Meryl stars-Meryl Streep, Christopher Reeve, Robert Redford. Richard Dreyfuss will play the Old Town residents who each supply one ingredient to the quiche. Marlon Brando will make a short appearance as the Hostess Pie driver, and Sir Laurence Olivier has expressed interest in appearing as The Man With the Stomach Pump. Local actor Jere Calmes has landed a key role, as the once-famous deli owner who redeems his honor (and saves T.T.'s life) by throwing himself on a rapidly-spoiling whipped eclair. Competition is fierce for the role of T.T. Actresses vying for the role include Jill Clayburgh, Jane Fonda, Susan Sarandon, Carrie Fisher, Goldie Hawn, and Jessica Lange. In another development, Loni Anderson has been signed to play Debbie Fields, T.T.'s arch-rival, who stalks our heroine with deadly steel-shrapnel-chip cookies, which she hurls like grenades. Insiders who have seen early footage say the special effects in the yeast sequence are the most spectacular since "Star Wars." A man who couldn't get a free Coke from his local McDonald's caused a ruckus that led to his being jailed. But now he's won a jury verdict against the old Hamburglar after a trial in Omaha, Nebraska, according to an AP report. Gary Fetter claimed he won the free drink in a McDonald's contest last January. But when he tried to claim it, the restaurant staff said in effect, "Sorry, we don't do it all for you!" He had to make another purchase to get the freebie, they said. Fetter made a scene and refused to leave, said the restaurant manager. Well, now Fetter has done it all to McDonald's. The jury award for false imprisonment, malicious prosecution and libel amounts to $14,000. Where else could you hear this, but on a PBS fund-raising telethon? "While you're waiting for the National Ballroom Championships, Cham-pionships, which we have coming right up, ask yourself where else could you get this kind of programming?" (This is a real quote.) Yes, we know the local educational stations don't do this very often, but their fundraisers have developed a uniquely annoying quality. As soon as a program finishes, someone usually steps in front of the camera with a speech like this: "We hoped you enjoyed 'Those Amazing Maggots,' That was some wonderful footage they had there, don't you think? Once again, let us remind you that quality programming like this is not possible without donations from you, the viewer. It's your money that makes it possible for us to present programming like "Dead Novel Playhouse," "College Prig Perspective," "Classic Comic Cartoon Theater," "Juab Farm Report," and "Bahai Week in Review. "In a few minutes, we're, planning to present that very fine, very popular film, 'Monty Python and the Holy Grail.' However, the station is in a very delicate cash-flow situation right now. And according to our tote board, we won't be able to present the movie unless we raise some $250,000. If not, we will proceed with our alternate program selection selec-tion 'Fun With Lintballs.' So, please, keep those pledges coming in." Rock 'n' roll and the military are no longer natural enemies. (In this country, for instance Joe Cocker sings the theme for "Officer and a Gentleman.") In Spain, the Defense Ministry has formed a group called "Command Rock 'n' Roll" to improve the image of the armed forces. (We can see the poster now "The Punk. The Proud. The Marines." Even in Russia, rock musicians are used to entertain troops. But according to an AP report, the troops didn't like a group called "Blue Buitars" for not being Marxist enough. In a letter to the armed forces newspaper "Red Star," a group of officers complained, "We can pardon all the roar and rattle from high-powered electronic devices that assaulted listeners and which, for some unknown reason, was called music. We also can close our eyes to their clowning and also to their tactless begging for applause." But, the letter went on, the group's "ideological and artistic value" was very harmful. Meanwhile, the official music critic for "Pravda," Dr. Bopski, wrote: "We are muchly talking decadence here, comrades. The people's revolution is endangered by bourgeois harmonies and running-dog guitar riffs. Get your imperialist presence offa my cloud, you lackey knuckleheads! " According to Salt Lake's "Enterprise" newspaper, two Idaho businessmen plan to open a series of drive-ins that will sell only two products potatoes and soap. The "Spuds and Suds" drive-in chain will open five outlets in Salt Lake by next fall, according to president Rodney Griffen. Griffen said his business will work because he offers two of America's most demanded products. "Potatoes are a main part of the diet, and soap is a main item used by housewives," he said. The customer can drive up and ask for a bulk quantity of potatoes or detergent. The method is quick because he will know what he wants. (There's not much room for indecisiveness there.) This may begin a nationwide trend. If successful, Griffen could also sell beer and men's clothes, and the shops could be called "Spuds, Suds, Buds and Duds." Another business, offering fried chicken and dollar-changing dollar-changing machines, could be called "Clucks and Bucks." And one could start a weight-reducing clinic that also repairs car tires "Fatties and Flatties." Next to Stein Eriksen Sport on the plaza at the Park City Ski Area 649-2124 MM MM I I I mm IT I m 1 Wl Wt .MM Even the smallest ads are read. |