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Show picnic, but I set to work and soon' got it changed so that it would do very well. Slattery seems never to have 00 STORY' A OUR WIT AND HUMOR. asked any one to ride a tandem. But LITTLE LAUGHMAKERS FROM when I had written It, it seemed so . , OUR EXCHANGES. dreadfully stiff that I had to put a little beginning and end of my own, which seemed to brighten It up a good deal. I thought there was something fuSMy Sandwiched in with1 Some of Our Own Slake The Game as Played at Pump-ki- n about the beginning and end. Did you? Fancy your noticing the v 111 e A Fashion Note Flotsam difference In style. How quick you are! Jetsam. I am very slow at things like that. I find ought to have been a woodman, or gamekeeper, or something. I was made F COURSE we get on those lines. But I have found somethe worst of It a thing now. few times in the What is that, then? year, "Ranching. I have a chum in Texas, we . are glad But and he says It Is a rare life. I am to we are 11 v- -f that buy a share in his business. It is all in lng, and we the open air shooting, and riding, and t gently perse- -' sport. Would it wbuldjit inconvenience vere; you much, Ida, to come out there with And,' though 'were me? beat right down Ida nearly fell off her perch in her the line, we bear amazement: The only words of which up neath our she could think were My goodness His, me! so she said them. we know well turn up victors when For If It would not upset your plans, we meet the Pumpkinvilles. or change your arrangements in any way. He had slowed down and let go Theres something kind of sociable In of the steering handle, so that the great playing there, I think; machine crawled aimlessly about from The runners dont mind stopping beone side of the road to the other. I tween bases for a drink. know very well that I am not clever or The umpire always joins right In and never puts on frills anything of that sort, but still I would do all I can to make you very happy. With those who do the treating when we play the Pumpkinvilles. Dont you think that in time you might come to like me a little bit? Ida gave a cry of fright. I wont We do not bow In homage to the wearers of a name; like you If you run me against a brick are not dazzled by some chance to We wall, she said, as the machine rasped a club of fame. beat against the curb. Do attend to the Were satisfied to hold the simple tribsteering. to ute our skill. Yes, I will. But tell me, Ida, whether Which This club can always reads,1 me. come will with you beat the too absurd! I know. Pumpkinville. Oh, dont Its How can we talk about such things Go on In your career, you fretting glory when I cannot see you? You speak to go: the nape of my neck, and, then I have Your chasers, bubble will surely burst as fame to twist my head round to answer. fickle breezes blow. I know. That was why I put You In While we can. forever on In comdrift front upon my letter. I thought that and good will. it Would make It easier. But if you Securefort in endless triumph oer, the nine would prefer, it I will stop the machine, from Pumpkinville. and then you can sit around and talk It. about Good gracious! cried Ida. Fancy Experience Teaches. our sitting face to face on a motionless k Tailor (measuring customer) Are you tricycle In the middle of the road, and married or single? all the people .looking out of their winCustomer I have been married a few dows at us! months. It would look rather funny, wouldnt Then you will want a secret pocket It? Well, then, suppose that we both in the lining of your vest. get off and push the tandem along in What for? front of us? That shows how short a time you Oh, no, this is better than that. have been married. You will peed a Or I could carry the thing. place to put a little change where your Ida burst out laughing. That would wife cant find it. You see Im a marbe more absurd still. ried man myself.? Then we will go quietly, and I will look out for steering. Iv wont tlk about Not Good. It at all if you would rather not. But I She looks good enough to eat. really do love you very much, and you She overheard his words and they would make me happy if you came to troubled Although he was a mere Texas' with me, and I think that per- cannibal her. she a captive in his and haps after a time I could make you hands, her conscience accused her. happy, too. I will tell him all, she said. But your aunt?. Taking him aside, then, she Informed Oh, she would like it very much. I him that she was a woman with a past, can understand that your father might whereat he started violently, and pernot like; to lose you. Im sure I wouldnt ceived how deceptive are appearances. either. If I were he. But, after all, AmerTribune. Detroit ica is not very far off nowadays, and is not so very wild. We would take a Business. a copy of grand piano, and and and Affable Stranger Ah, sir, I see youre his wife Browning. And Denver wottfd come over to see us. We should stopping at this hotel. Do you play be quite a family party. It would be poker, sir? Deacon Wayback (gruffly) Thats my t jolly. si f. '' business Ida sat listening to the stumbling Affable Stranger And mine, too, words and awkward phrases which were Of her, but pard. Put it here. Youve got the best whispered from the back ts for a profesh that I ever was in Charles makeup there something clumsiness of speech which saw. Ex. was more moving than the words of the most eloquent of pleaders. He paused, One of Those Kind Remarks. he stammered, he caught his breath beThere Is one in your future hustween the words, and he blurted out bands characterpoint that you are to be conin little blunt phrases all the hopes of gratulated on, said Miss Cayenne. his heart. If love had not come to her What is that? asked the engaged yet, there was at least pity and symgirl, her eyes lighting with happiness. "He is very easy to please. pathy, which are nearly akin to It. Wonder there was also that one so How do you know? weak and frail as she should shake this so well satisfied with himself. Hes strong man so, should have the whole Washington Star. course of his life waiting for her decision. Her left hand was on he cushion Way Up. at her side. He. leaned forward and took want you to get Ethel Wife Fond I it gently in his own. She did not try to and some of those twenty-fou- r myself draw it back from him. button gloves. May I have it, said he,j for life? Loving Husband I cannot do It, Oh, do attend to your steering, said dear. Thiy are very expensive. she, smiling round at him; and dont Fond more about this today. Please come Wife I know it, darling. They say any high, but we must have them. . vdont! When shall I know, theii? Another Monopoly. Oh, tonight, tomorrow, I dont know. must someClara. ask Talk I Promise me, she said, as she rested about her head lovingly upon his highly polthing else. And they did talk about something ished shirt front, that you will never love anyone but me. else; but her left hand was still enclosed In his, and he knew, "Without ask"Darling, I promise, the happy lover in' again, that all was well. responded. You shall have Aregular Oil cinch upon my affections. Standard (TO BB CONTINUED. J Ex. FOR AN UNSPOKEN SPEECH. Fashion Note. Highest of all in Leavening Power. Latest U. S. Govt Report fl u)cMLiij Ugv r Y:NVDP,f , . ' Or A. CONAN DOYL& i see In me? Oh, I do pray that you may not repent. It! The gentle heart was ruffled amid Its Joy by the thought of Its own unworthiness. Repent it! I feel that I am a saved man. You do not know how degrading this city life is how debasing, and yet how absorbing. 'Money forever, clinks In your ear. You 'can think of nothing else. From the bottom of my heart I hate It, and yet how can I draw back .INTERNATIONAL PRESS ASSOCIATION (CHAPTER VI. CDNTXNtrED). repeated, far as I know, plara the to where moved away widow the or the net, were grouped round house. the Luntering slowly .towards follow hep, but her. head was She rose to ,'in a. whirl witi new! thoughts, and she for AS .gat that Influence already. I know that I am talking to you I am a better It Is you who must go with me when man. best it thought life, or I must walk forever as a moth-wh- o through down again. Which would he Ida Harold or Charles? She yer with as much solicitude without bringing grief to my dear old father?, There was but one way ip which I could defy the taint, andr that Was by having a home Influence so pure and so high that It may brace me up against all that draws me down, I have felt alrnie. ' Harold child. Oh, Harold, I am so happy! Still plans for hep only had seemed to) her to b in many, ways, they wandered amid the darkening best young man; shadows, while one by one the stars the noblest ahd-thever she was to peeped out In the blue-blac- k If known. -- whom she had sky above as them. At last a chill Jove a man it would be; such a man blew up wind night she must not think of herself.. from the east, and brought them backto ..that.-Bu- t the realities of life. She had, reason to believe that hoth would You must go In. You will be cold. Yfhich sister. lovdd her men .these the My father will wonder where I am. be the best for her? But perhaps f .matter was already decided. She could Shall I say anything to him? conversation the of If you like, my scrap not forget Or I will In the morning. I mustdarling. which she had heard the night before, tell mother tomy renight. I know- how delighted she" will xor the secret,1 which her sister had fused to confide to her. If Ida would be. I do, hope so. ..not tell her, ihere was! but one person and Let me take you up the garden path. who could. She raised her eye, be-- j Is so dark. Your lamp is not lit yet- Denver was It standing .there Hajrold e -- i J were lost In your thoughts, smilihg. I hope that they were then, dearest. I You Till tomorrow, .Harold. .said he, My own darling! He stooped, and ones. their lips met for the first time. Then, pleasant as said she, rising. was she I jplanningj pushed open the folding windows fOh, It seems rather a waste of time as a she heard his quick,, firm step as it .rule, for things have a way of working passed down the graveled path. A themselves put just as you least exlamp was lit as she entered the room, and there was Ida, dancing about-likpect. a mischievous little fairy in front of (What were you planning, then? her. .The future. And have you anything to tell me? Whose? she Oh, my own and Idas. asked, with a solemn face. Then, And was I included in your joint fu-- ! suddenly throwing her arms round her itures? sisters neck, Oh, you dear, dear old Clara! I am so pleased. I am so pleased. I hope all pur friends were Included. go .in,' said lie, as, she bpgan .Dont I to move slowly towards the house. CHAPTER VII. stroll up wanted to have a word.; Let us VENIT xadvem felicitas. .and down the lawn. Perhaps you! are T WAS Just three ;old. If you' are I could bring you out days after the Doci shawl. I am not cold. tor and the Admiral Oh, no, V 1 had congratulated Ida I was speaking to your sister was each other upon the last night. She notice; that there Closer tie which a slight quiver in his Voice, and, glanciclear-cuto his unite their she t 'was at face, dark, ng up two families, and saw that h was veryj grave. She felt to turn their friendthat it I was; settled, apd that he had come td ask her for her sisters hand. ship Into something even dearer and She is a charming girl, said he, aft--; more Intimate, that a pause.; Miss Ida Walker re,1 "Indeed she is,? cried Clara warmly. has! a with ceived not lived letter which caused her some And no one who can tell surprise and considerable amusement. her and known her Intimately how charming and godd she is. phe is It was dated from next door, and was handed in by the like a sunbeam in the house. page after could be . breakfast. who was. not good .BQ absolutely Dear Miss Ida, began this curious happy asjshe seems to be. Heavens last gift, I think, is a mind document,, and then relapsed suddenly so pure and a spirit so high that it is into the third person. Mr. Charles unable even to see what is impure and Westmacott hopes that he may have evil in the world around us. For as the pleasure of a ride with Miss Ida long as we can see it,! how can we be Walker upon his tandem tricycle. Mr. ' J. Charlqs Westmacott will bring It round .truly happy? . She (has a deeper side, also. She does In half an hour. You in front. Yours nottufn it to. the world, and it is not very truly, Charles Westmacott. The d whole was written In a large, . natura; that she should, for she is .Very and schoolboyish hand, very and has aspiratyoung. But she thinks,; thin on the up strokes and thick on the ions of her own. -You cannot admirp her more than down, as though care and pains had do. ask l gone to the fashioning of It. Indeed, Miss WAlker, I only to be brought Into" nearer relationship Strange as was the form, the meanWith her, and to feelj that there is'; a ing was clear enough; so Ida hastened to her room, and had hardly slipped on permanent bpnd between us. It had come at last. For a momenir her light grey cycling dress when she her heart was numbed within her, and saw the tandem with its large occupant then a flood of sisterly love carried all at the door. He handed her up to her before it. Down with the dark thought saddle with a more solemn and thoughtwhich would still try to raise its unful face than was usual with him, and hallowed head! She turned to Harold a few moments later. they were flying with sparkling eyes and words p t- pleps-pr- e along the beautiful, smooth suburban ' f roads In the direction of Forest Hill. upon her lips. I should wish to be 'near and dear to The great limbs of the athlete made the hoth of ypu, said hej, as hje took her heavy machine spring and quiver with hand. "I should wish Ida to (be my, sisevery, stroke; while the mignon grey ter, and you my wife.j . figure with the laughing face, and the She saiq nothing. She only, stood golden curls blowing from under the straw hat, simply looking at him with parted- lips and little ?reat, dark, questioning eyes. The lawn held firmly to her perch, and let the round whirl beneath had vanished away, the sloping gardtreadles Mile mile after feet. ens, the bitek villas, the darkening sky her beatwind the With half a pale moon beginning to show they flew, over the chimney tops. 'All was gone, ing in her face, the tree. dancing past and she was only conscious of a dark, in two long ranks on either side, until earnest, pleading face' and of a voice, they had passed round Croydon and far awayl disconnected from herself, were approaching Norwood once more the voice, of a man telling a woman how from the further side. he loved her. He was Arent you tired? she asked, glancunhappy, aid the voice, his life was avoid; he hajd come ing over her shoulder and turning toto the parting of the .ways, here lay hapwards him a little pink ear, a fluffy piness and honor, and jail that was high golden curl, and one blue eye twinkling and noble; there lay the soul-killifrom the very corner of its lid. th4 Not a bit. I am Just getting my round, lonely life, the base pursuit of money, the sordid,' selfish aims. He swing. to be strong? You needed but the hand of the woman that Isnt it wonderful "he loved to lead him Into the me a steam engine. of remind better, always steam a engine? life his path. Amjl how he lpved her Why .would show. Well, because it Is so powerful, and He lpved her for her sweetness for her. womanliness, for reliable, and unreasoning. Well, I didnt her strength. He had need of her. "Would mean that, last, you know, but but she come to him? And then of a sud-de- n you know What I mean. What Is the as she listened It pame home to her matter withyPu? that the man was JEIarold Denver, and Why? that she yvas the woman, and that all Because you have something on your Copswork was very beautifulthe mind. You have anot laughed once. I Steen sward beneath her feet, the rustlgruesome laugh. He broke into he. said am In ing leaved, the long prange slashes quite jolly, And are the western sky. She jnof. why did you no, .you scarce Oh, spoke; she stiff knew what the broken a letter?. me such dreadfully write words were, sure was I but she saw the he cried, now, out There,' of joy shine light 5n his face, and her hand was still In it was 'stiff." bis as they wandered amid'the twilight. Then why write it? They said no more now, but only wan-cterIt wasnt my qwn composition. Whose then? Your aunt's? and felt each! others presence. All was fresh Oh, no. It wasl a person of the name around them, familiar yet nkw, tinged with the beauty of of Slattery. t&eir new Goodness! Who is he? found, happiness. come out, I felt Did you not know1 it before, he I knew it would heard of Slattery, asked. You've would. it that id not dare. think It. the author?' what a mask of ice I must wear! Never.. could a man feel as I hafe done is wonderful at expressing himne fliout showing It? Your sister, at self He wrote a book called The Secret fore her. f J " r e ; j j ; j ( . j , er j j j red-head- ed No-o- ne , j , ) loose-jointe- J j -- j ! j j - pink-band- ed ; , ng : j ed . , j j . ; i I i . . West-macot- - v j x The Irish Patriot Jailed for Words He Didnt Say. A member of the Land sent from Dublin to a certain district to get up a meeting and makte a speech, says the New York Journal. On reaching the town wheye the meeting was to be held the speech-mak- , It d A man sentenced to be hanged asked fot a suspension of public opinion in its stead. 1 Cure Pisos for Consumption is an asthma medicine. W. II. Williams, Antioch, Ills., April 11. 1SD4. What has done more for the elevation oi woman than the balloon? A-N- o. Mothers Appreciate the good work of Parkers Ginger Tonic, with its reviving qualities a boon to the and nervous. A mutton-heade- d doctor always has hli ! sheepskin with him. When you come to realize that your corns are gone," and no more pain, how grateful you feel. All the work of Hindercorns. 15c. A crowning danger in the wild Indian country is scalping. Klin' Great FITS All Fits No freeby Dr. Nerve Restorer.stopped Fitsafter the Urstdays use. Marvelous cures. Treatise and (2 trial bottle free Fit cases. Bead to lr. KlineSl Arch St.,Phila., Fa. I'm down on your cheek, as the beard said to the youth. ' ' GREAT BOOK FREE. - When Dr. R. V. Pierce, of Buffalo, N. Y., published the first edition of his work, The Peoples" Common Sense Medical Adviser, he announced that after 68o,ooo copies had been sold at the regular; prige, per copy, the profit on which would repay' him for the great amount of labor and money disexpended in producing it, hewould tribute the next half million free. As this number of copies has already been sold, he is now distributing, absolutely free, 500,000 most com copies of this COUPON interesting and valplete, common sense medNo. 1 1 1 uable - published ical work ever the recipient only being required to mail to him, at the above address, this, little (21) cents in one-cecoupon with twenty-on- e for stamps to pay postage and packbe sent by mail. will book the and , ing only complete It is a veritable medical library, in one volume. It contains over 1000 pages and more than 300 illustrations. The Free Edition is precisely the same as those sold at $1.50 except only that the books are bound in strong manilla paper covers instead of cloth. Send now before all are given away. They are going off' rapidly. $1-5- Dont Drag Your Feet. Many men do because the nerve centers, use of tobacco, weakened by the become so affected that they are weak, tired, lifeless, listless, etc. All this can easily be overcome if the tobacco user wants to quit and gain manhood, nerve power, and enjoy vigor--1 ously the good things of life. Take Guaranteed to cure or money refunded by Druggists everyw here Book free. Address the Sterling Remedy Co. .New York City or Chicago. ed No-To-Ba- well-trie- Sr - long-continu- If the Baby is Cutting Teeth. eure and use that old and remedy, Winslows Soothing .T for Children Teething- - Be An engineering plan of enormous proportions, and one that will cost $27,000,000 to complete, is the metropolitan water supply legislature system which the Massachusetts authorized at the last session. It proposesBos-to wafer for of furnish an adequate supply ton, Chelsea, Everett, Malden, Medford, Newton and Somerville, and to the six small towns lying nearest to Boston.. The about population in this district includes one-thir- d the entire poulation of the state, and it is growing with disproportionate then, the problem of rapidity. Manifestly, the district with good water is furnishing not a simple or inexpensive one to solve. The nearest source where a sufficient quanof pure water can be found is the tity south branch of the Nashua river, and this will yield 472,000,000 gallons daily, a supply for the wants of the district for adequate some time to come. By the terms ,of the measure which the Legislature has passed, the cities of Woburn and Quincy, with a cluster of towns around them, are to be allowed to enter the district, if they shall decide to do so, and it is believed that the water system which has been planned will be able to supply their wants, in addition to the cities and towns included in the original district. A metropolitan water board has been created by the Legislature to have charge of this great public enterprise, and it is empowered to issue bonds to the amount of the estimated cost of the works, payable in gold after a term of forty years. A sinking fund,- which is to be increased by regular investments from the water rentals, is provided for on a plan that will secure the payment of the bonds at maturity. Alexcites together the enterprise is one thatmethods-binterest by its magnitude and the which its objet is to be secured. I I I c. nt City at the Bottom of the Sett. The city authorities at Rovlgno, on the peninsula of Istria, in the Adriatic sea, have discovered, a little south of the peninsula, the ruins of a large town at the bottom of the sea. It had been observed for years that fishermens nets were sometimes enbe masses of tangled in what appeared to were brought masonry of which fragments up from the sea bed. Then a diver declared that he had seen walls and streets below the water, and so the authorities of Rovlgnoa decided to investigate. They sent down diver, who, at the depth of eighty feet, found himself surrounded at the bottom of the "sea by ruined walls. Continuing his explorations, he traced the line of walls, and was able to distinguish TEIIT & AYIIIIIG V5S&. us. 1687 how the streets were laid out. He did not see any doors or windows, for they were FemaleWeakness of any kind 36 Viavi( Cures hidden by masses of seaweed and incrustaLondoner Bk,1630 Arapahoe st.Denver a for distance the He traced tions. masonry of 100 feet, and there he had to stop, for his Leather and Shoe Findings. Manufacturers a diving cord did not permit him to go farth- Boot andShoe Uppers Illustrated Catalogue Free er. He had proved beyond a doubt that he The Dunn St Blass Leather Co. 1743 Lawrence St. had found the ruins of a once inhabited town, which through some catastrophe had HOSE AI1D THROAT. been covered by the sea. It is probable that EYE. EAR. Mack Block, liith and (Jal llomia. these are the ruins of the lost town of Clssa, Dr. C. W. ENOS, mentioned of island by name, the that upon Pliny the elder. New York Sun. AMERICAN HOUSE Denver's Old Reliable HoteL? Laugh and Grow Fat ! and wagon supplies. You shall do both, even if you are a slab-side- m AOIfOMITll I tl studebaker Wagons and CarDLAlmOml if you dyspeptic, pallid, of riages. Sen d for Prices. Lighthall Hardware Co. reinforce digestion. Insure the conversion refood into rich and nourishing blood, and of mining, printing and sleep by the systematic Machinist Repairs cover etc. Pipe threading and cutting. use of appetite the great renovator of health, strength Freight elevators. Nock & Garslde, 1415-1- 7 18th st. Stomach Bitters, and flesh, Hostetters which also remedies malarial, kidney and THE WYMAN IMPLEMENT rheumatic trouble, nervousness, constipation Company, Denver, Colo. Hay Machinery, Farm and biliousness. and Qnartz Wagons, Order Wagons and Buggies: Write for prices. A back number the one that a saucy urchin chalks upon an unsuspecting man s LIVE STOCK COMMISSION, back, Just for fun. CLAY ROBINSON & CO. Denver, Omaha, Kansas City and Chicago. ConBethanv College, at Llndsborg, Kansas, sign your stoo k to them. You can rely on the high-or 11. will begin its fifteenth year September est market price. Markets furnished by wire has had a wonderful growth, and letter free. Let u s hear from you. Bethany dey stands as one of the strongest nominational colleges in the West, with twenty-thre- e professors and 444 students. recognized by Yale, Its college diploma is universities.. Strong and European Chicago Fop Sale for $70. In Latin, Greek, French and departmentsGood was only used to cut 20 acres, The Binder This normal departments. German. in and is Just as good as new, and in perfect business college has the finest class-roodepartments order. the state. The music and art lead all the other colleges. In music, inBeththe THE L. A. YATKIIIS MDSE. CO. no competition any is said to have are in trained Europe. artists 15th and Wazee Sts., DENVER, COLO. Her West. fine, pleasBethanv has a beautiful campus,her popularant surroundings,herandan deserves of students E. E. BURLINGAfiTE'S increase which gave ity even last year. This year a large gymnasium and auditorium Is being erected. And Chemical Laboratory. with no money to Established 1863. Singular that a man trouble him should have money troubles. JEWELERS AND PHOTOGRAPHERS. To Cleanse sweeps and waste containing gold 6endyour System for treatment. Prompt returnr and silver and silEffectually yet gently,. .when costive or and highest cash price paid for gold 1733 Law1736 or and ver Address .is bullion. blood or the when bilious, impure rence Street; 4enver. Colorado, habitual cure to permanently sluggish, constipation, to awaken the kidneys and EVERY GIRL "WANTS A FELLOW liver tor a healthy activity, without Ir- to look nice and clean. We use nothing but pure soap and water; gives a finer finish, more pliaweakening them, to dispel ritating or colds holds to shape better and Stays Clean of use ble, or fevers Syrup headaches, Much Longer when we wash them. What the ; Figs. fellow? Ohl No! His shirts. cuffs and collars. No one laughs harder at a poker joke than Fellows, club together; send us $5.00 to be- Young worth of laundry atone time and we pay express the man who wants the bystanders if within 1,009 miles, and lieve that he understand it. charges both ways f Denver prices. Agents wanted you only Tr.enmal Couclave, Knights charge and Twenty-Sixt- h in all outside towns. Write for 1248-5price lists 26-3Curtis St. 0 particulars. Queen City Laundry, Tomplar, Boston, Mass,, August The Union Pacific has been selected as the official route of the Grand Commandery. Official train will leave Denver at 10 p. m., A SURE CURE FOR PILES Colorado Itching Piles known by moisture like perspiration, esast Tickets on sale from first-clasAugust 22. s 22 at one lowest intense itching when warm. This tormanil Blind, BleedAugust 17 toround good to September ing or Protrndmg Piles yield at once to fare for the trip, PILE REMEDY, DR. 15, with privilege of extension until Octoon parts affected, absorbs tnmorc.aW ber 6. See nearest ticket agent, or c&Il on which acts directly itching, effecting a permanent core. Price Abo. or address , George Ady, 941 Seventeenth lays or mtil Dr. uosanko, Iliilada., Pa. Information. J Druggists additional for street, Denver, Denver Directory. 2K d, woe-bego- ne to-da- WHITELEY BINDER m ASSAY OFFICE 5 1 0. EDUCATIONAL. j ' w. H. GRIFFIN, Jackson, Michigan, writes: Suffered with Catarrh for fifteen years. Halls Catarrh Cure cured me." Sold by Druggists,75c. ACADEMY ! ; j hibition, he always makes a hit. n The report of the failure of the peach f crop is often a false alarm. land-leagu- er I Works to Cost More Thn Twenty-SeveMillion Dollars. OS . old-tim- J Actors are sometimes failures, but when a pugilist appears before the public, in an ex- BOSTON'S BIG WATER SCHEME , er met a friend, and, both bjelng genial fellows, they retired to a public house and had something. Then they began e talking over reminiscences, and the first thing the knew was that the attendant had come In to light the lamp. Great goodness! he said, I was sent down from Dublin to get up a meeting here and now it is too late. Oh, well, It dpesnt matter, said the other., Yes, but it does matted, said the organizer. I have to report to my superior that the meeting was; held. Oh, thats all right, said his friend. Here, you write out a speech and I will send it to the local papers, which will print It just as if the meeting was held. Then the people in Dublin wont know the difference. This was quickly done apd the speech that was never delivered appeared next day in the papers.8 The fun of the thing comes in over the fact that the leaguer was arrested and was sentenced to four; months in jail for aa speech that he never delivered, at meeting that was never held. Are They All Tender? of the emperor of Ruscommand By sia three enormous volumes, bound In Easy.' black seal, with purple silk linings, and Solved; or, Letter-writin- g of all Made let- - another in red seal with, white sorts of models you It gives linings, all with massive clasps in gold and siltsrs have been filled with cuttings from Ida burst out laughing. So you actu- ver, entire American press referring to the one. ally copied death of the late czar. and a illness to a the young lady Invite to was . knew. : Ida! It was last night. She began to praise yu I said what I felt, and then in an Mstant it was all out. ut viat could you what could you , )B0ILGJ'irCCrJ PZJCE - - The latest invention for summer wear Js the present electric bonnet fan, both beautiful and cooling. Truth. - ' i. An Aggravated Case. I .hear that your partner has absconded with $25,000 of your Mr. Friendly The pictures In a rogues gallery are not all steal engravings.. Salve. Hansons Magic Corn refunded. Ask or Warranted to cui-- druggist for it. Price 15 money cents. , HEART of the inSACRED this Academy, conducted The course of instruction Socied Heart, embrace, th. by the Religious of the neces ary to constitute a soud whole range of subjects per-- I and refined education. Propriety of deportment, sonai neatness and the principles of morality are obg attention. Extensive grounds afject- of unt ford the pupils every facility ior useful bodily oh' ect of constant solicitude, else; their health 1 an and in sickness they are attended31-with maternal cara P4P" Fall term open. Tuesday, Sept. TJIJC HUM Kltltkkt. ticulars, address ir ea-iu- your , - The height of tyirannyto arrest a brook because it, murmurs, Academy baered Heart, Fr t. Josrph. Jlo, Is th That Bethany for College You. College i money. Mr. Coupon . LOCATED AT LIADSDO.TG, OASIS, Not only that, but the PIT. the aad Mo F, R B.Va few miles from two liner each of the Santa Fe and Rock Island, ungrateful scoundrel didnt take my LISTEN ! OnjCoUeg JJL diploma recognized without examination by Yale and other leading nnTersities wife with him after he had been flirt"Roof J ColleffC W UlieSt hv tab Hrift.rrl Rnlftndid I til al Nnrmal flnnraA oni r an tiurop an aruss oi nra. the S'.ate Areal Arc U8p jrtmaat in cuarg d H ing with her right under my very nose in 15 Pianos, fiaourc , :f Largesc Music School in'tha west. Hear! Two Fipe Organs, other o gins. menti. otner ana Cornet for for the past six months. department large Ora Mrio Choruj H irmjny, fine Violin departmanc. - . . An Unsatisfactory Answer. And you Prospective Father-In-Lato make my daughter happy? promise Enamored Youth I will care for her like a beautiful flower. I hope Prospective Father-in-Layou dont mean that she Is to live on w Chapel seats l.iMJ. Auditorium 1,001 Commodious steam heated buildings Ladies Hatl under superv thorougn w a, cipal. Beautiful shaded grounds, new Gnnnasium, Wilitarr company, moderate chargor, no saloons, gambl ng dens or theatres. Good as the best in the East and half cheaper Senator Cato ? format .a. A. SWENSON, 1 lu Key, CARL . , 00(j climate, , h ires. w water and air. Friendly Encouragement. Scene A concert for the people. Distinguished Amateur (about to make his first appearance in public) Oh, I do feel so nervous! Sympathetic Friend Oh, theres no occasion to be nervous, my dear fellow. They applaud anything. Ex. Cabled Field and Hog Fence cabled Pcdiry, Garden and Rabbit Fer Web Picket Lawn Fence, etc. Steel t,unli y ilrst class: PRICES LOW. Catalogue FREE.' De Kalb Fence Co, 121 High St,. De Kalb. il. |