Show f r 1 E j 1 I I M W I It Notes o of f a New J Yorker wr or s S An Argentine official was addressing address- address f Ing a gathering of Col Peron's Pron's officers cers clique He shouted The pluto pluto- tj i. who are responsible for this war must not go unpunished The Yankee and British imperialists who l are trying to squeeze our beloved Argentina to the wall attempted to todo todo todo do the same to Germany That Tha is isis isis is isis is why the German nation under Hitler struck back at their enemies Nor can we allow the Jewish Bol alliance which emanates from Moscow to hem us in We too must try to save the world from the Red menace At that moment a messenger placed a slip of paper into the speakers speaker's speakers speaker's speak speak- ers er's hand He glanced at it and read Argentina invited to World Security Conference Startled the official cleared his throat and resumed And so in conclusion gentlemen I say Long CLong live Democracy Your Words Dept Edward Edward Edward Ed Ed- ward R R. R in a letter to Rep Jack Anderson of California dated January 28 1945 wrote that the U. U S. S should not enter into normal diplomatic relations with the Fascist military clique which is in control of Argentina A couple of dainty debs tripped into a swank bar I never drink in inthe inthe inthe the afternoon said the first expertly expert expert- ly settling herself on the stool but Im I'm simply beat Gotta have something something something some some- thing to pep me up Me too moaned her friend What U were you doing Oh was the reply I just came from the most awful cocktail cocktail cocktail cock cock- tail party At the l Cafe folks discussing discussing discussing dis dis- dis- dis cussing the pro-and-conference pro news mentioned that Frisco isn't the term San Franciscans prefer when referring to that great city remarked a wag hear from Joe San Francisco lately A San Francisco gazette of the crime ridden Gold Rush period carried this item Some contend that there are really no laws in force here but the divine law and the law of nature while others are of the opinion that there are laws in force here if they could only be found Newspaper men of that day hurled insults both verbally and in print Some wrote satirical satirical satirical cal verse They took sides in political quarrels to the point of fist fistfights fistfights fistfights fights and duels One editor hung a placard over his desk reading Subscriptions received received received re re- re- re from 9 to 4 challenges from 11 to 12 only In the course of one of his lecture lecture lecture lec lec- ture tours Mark Twain made a stopover at a small California town Before dinner he visited the barber barbershop barbershop barbershop shop for a shave Youre a stranger in town arent aren't you queried queried queried quer quer- the barber uY Yes es Twain replied This is my first time here You chose a good time to come the barber continued Mark Twain is going to lecture tonight Think you'll be going Oh I guess so Have you bought your ticket If you haven't you'll have to stand cause everything is sold out warned the barber Doggone cussed Twain I never saw such confounded luck Every time that fellow lectures I have to stand A west coast war plant has discovered a unique way of checking absenteeism A labor- labor management committee investigates investigates investigates gates all who do not report for work If it is found that an individual has been needlessly absent the following following following follow follow- ing payday he receives some Jap currency in his envelope and a note which reads The extra money is a bonus bonns sent by the Mikado It is Hirohito's personal regard for your failure failure fail- fail ure are to report for work He De was glad to pay yon you for not making making making mak mak- ing the war materials our soldiers soldiers sol sol- so- so r diers need The mother of a bobbysoxer had hada a a rude awakening the other day She learned her daughter was no longer a child The daughters daughter's friend had planned a gathering for fora i a group of youthful sailors just recently recently rei re re- re- re pressed into the service When the teen-ager teen was leaving the house the mother said Have Havea a good time at the party dear and be a good girl To which daughter quipped Oh mother make up your mind Burgess edited a magazine called The Lark in the One of its famous contributors of nonsense nonI nonsense non non- I sense sense verse was Carolyn Wells I Iwas It was in The liThe Lark that Burgess Burgess' classic The liThe Purple Cow appeared appeared appeared ap ap- and also this one I love loveto loveto to go to lectures and make the audience audience audience audi audi- ence stare by walking round upon their heads an peoples people's hair Burgess was wise He ditched the magazine while it was still thriving explaining I wanted it to die young and in its freshness |