OCR Text |
Show Serendipity JPrtS by DaleSimons New Classes Eccl. 1:9 And there is no new thing under the sun This is an open letter to principles and educators suggesting some new classes. I know they wont listen because they already have their minds made up. I am writing this column slowly because I know they dont read fast. How long must we go on in the status quo and The mess were in? Whats wrong with change it's the perfect way to have a little variety in the school curriculum? We are badly in need of a few new challenges for the complacent and often bored students. We need some way to keep up the interest of those who think the schools were organized just so the town could have a football and basketball team. I suggest the following classes be implemented immediately: FOR FOOTBALL PLAYERS: Overcoming peace of mind. Creative group suffering. Head knocking with a purpose. How to be pals with your coach. Lets replace pot with anabolics. How to cheat in weight lifting. How to get a football scholarship with no ability. CAREER EDUCATION: Career opportunities in El Salvador. Looters guide to Utah cities. Tax shelters for bid coaches. Other career opportimities for losing coaches. The underachievers guide to small career opportimities. Lifetime careers as an athletic manager. Officiating as opposed to working for a living, the arts: How to endure a symphony without peanuts. Tap dance your way to social ridicule. Shower singing the easy way. The use of popcorn in symphony appreciation. Overcoming your fear of cymbols and the piccolo. Art appreciation for dropouts. Wining your way out of piano lessons. Intelligent musical discussions thru the use of name dropping. HEALTH EDUCATION: How to cure acne by doing pushups. Jogging your way to arthritis. The relationship of carbonated water to suppositories. Anerobic breathing and how to stop it. Motorcycle riding as an alternative to distance running. The seven meals a day diet. Yogurt as a substitute for Health Insurance. Overcoming muscle tone by use of the daily nap. FOR BASKETBALL PLAYERS High altitude breathing made easy. How to shoot while being triple teamed. Dunking the ball with the use of a portake stepladder . Converting your family room into a gym. Using the armpit defense against smaller opponents. How to blame losses on your teamates and still keep your friends. Dirty tactics for use against taller players, lamafiouge and the use of elevator shoes, i may not agree with me but I think the new classes listed above could add a lot of zip to the local class schedule and liven up the school day. I guarantee the average daily attendance will go up and fewer athletes will be ineligible, if these classes are adopted immediately. Best of luck to you innovative administrators who are willing to try them. Simons Says: Small boy to father-teacheWhy do we go to school season Do we tickets? have every day? r: The Eiffel Tower paid for its construction costs through money paid by sightseers within one year after its 1 ports Row and run slated for Jordan River state parkway The Utah State Division of Parks Jordan River Row and Run event. and Recreation, Department of This canoe-kava- k and running contest Natural Resources and Energy, in will be held Saturday. September 11, conjunction with the Utah State at 9 a.m. as a 1982 State Fair activity. Division of Expositions is sponsoring a A ribbon-cuttinceremony officially opening the new Jordan River State Parkwav-UtaState Fair Park will be featured as part of the Row and Run event. The Row and Run contest will begin on the Jordan River State Parkway at 1700 South 1200 West adjacent to the Wildwave swimming pool. Teams will be composed of two members in the Believe it or not, there are over canoe divisions and one member in the all 27.000 soccer players in Utah kayak division. Contest divisions members of organized teams and most include open kayak, two-macanoe, of them have uniforms. Europes most mixed canoe, and popular sport is rapidly gaining in womens canoe teams. Participants popularity here in the USA according must furnish their own canoes or Zone Manager to Jim Baker kayaks. Teams wishing to rent canoes who announced the involvement of Utahs soccer players in a fund raising from the Jordan River State Parkway drive for muscular dystrophy. must make reservations at the parkWere inviting every soccer player way office. 1545 W est 1000 North, Salt in Utah to march for Jerrys Kids over Lake City. the Labor Day weekend, said Baker. Before beginning the rowing They can pick up their official MDA portion of the contest, one member of cannisters and instructions ar their the team will be required to complete neighborhood 7 Eleven and collect a l1? mile run along a course which money for this great cause. Then when will be set up in the vicinity of 1700 South 1200 W est. Teams will row their they turn in the money theyll receive a free slurpee.he said. canoes or kayaks three miles to the Jerry Lewis annual Labor Day finish line at the State Fairgrounds. Telethon has become one of the most fee for each team will be $4. Registration on the day of highly viewed programs on television, and millions of young people all over the contest will be $5. Team members the country have raised many millions will receive fair passes, of dollars to fight muscular dystrophy. prizes, and refreshments. Beginning Utahs soccer players will be at 7 :30 a m., interested persons may at the Utah State working to make it possible for others less fortunate to some day join them Division of Parks and Recreation on the field. said Baker. And I urge office. 1636 West North Temple, Salt them all to pick up their official Lake City, or at the site of the contest . 2 cannisters and instructions and start For additional information call or533-449working today. g h 27,000soccer players in Utah? ... n (male-femal- 533-449- 6. -- Thursday, Saptambar 2, S Tlmat-Pog- a a 1982-Mogn- Helping Children Collect to be more than a momentary craze, consider ways and means to increase the collection. Flea markets are good sources for a variety of collectible items at Collecting can be an enjoyable hobby not only for adults but for children as well because it encourages thinking and problem-solvin- g as classifying, sorting, looking in and asking books things up be a seem to part of colquestions relatively low prices. Second-han- d shops, friends and relatives may also be able to help increase the collection. lecting. Children of families who collect often seem happier and better able to entertain themselves. This is as true for collections that last two weeks as it is for collections which Tncouraging a hobby is not only a good way to keep your children busy and out of mischief, but it can also aid in the childs develop ment and be the beginning of a lifelong interest. for all Suggested collections last for years. If your child is interested in collecting, do encourage his or her interest. Relegate an area of the house where his collection can be displayed. Half the fun of a collection is being able to show it to others. Take an interest in your childs collection. This will give him pride and self confidence in himself. Buy your child a good album or scrapbook in which to keep his stamps, coins or whatever he is collecting. Help him to classify a few items so that he will learn how to do it himself. If his interest seems u decorative boxes, dolls, sea shells, rocks, animal miniatures or pictures, stickers, buttons, clocks, matches, vases, beer cans, stamps, coins, old magazines and books, old toys, piggybanks, model cars, ceramics, prints, guns, writing instruments coasters, thimbles, Coca-Col- a memorabilia, cigarette packs, rec ords, miniature liquor and wine bottles, paperweights, steins music-boxes- , ages: postcards plates, autographs. mum pre-regist- 533-601- Easter Seals 10,000 meter run and KSL-T- by Old Fashioned Hamburger Wendys Restaurants, this years Five Speed Challenge will be held Saturday, September 1 1 beginning at 9 a.m. in the west parking lot of the state capitol. Runners will follow the course down City Creek Canyon and return to the capitol to cross the finish line. Designed by race steward Ricky Joseph, the course offers plenty of challenge for the serious runner, while also allowing for family participation and enjoyment. With an entry fee of only $5, runners are encouraged to obtain additional donations from sponsors, as all money raised will benefit disabled children and adults involved in Easter Seal programs throughout Utah. Olympic-tvp- e Awards include medals, certificates of race completion. and certificates for a salad and soft drink at Wendys. While all runners will be eligible to receive matching running shorts and singlet s. sports bags and N ike running shoes, participants obtaining the most pledges will have a chance to win two tickets, donated by United Airlines, to anywhere United flies, as well as gift certificates at Foothill Village Sports Can a Den. and three nights lodging in a like this? at Deer condominium Valley. Divisional race winners will be eligible to win a trip for two on United Airlines to a major West Coast rdee of their choice. Entry forms are available at all For more Wendys and KSL-TV- . 250-565- 6 information, call the Five Speed Hotline at SLR give you Know some news? 486-393- exposures on shots hassle-fre- e Score One for SLRs Program remember the introduction of I the auto- exposure single lens reflex camera, remember thinking how dumb it was. Who couldnt match two needles in the viewfinder in order to get a proper exposure? Who needed a camera in which the user selected an aperture and it selected a shutter speed or vice versa? Like many other serious" SLR thought the photographers, would soon turn previously interested amateurs into a bunch of totally disinterested I auto-exposur- e snap-shooter- s, point-n-shooter- .EVIS, LEVIS, and about SERIOUS marriage, Salt Lake gen- tleman seeks 20s30's. Must be cere, healthy, lady sin- at- tractive, and have high moral standards. Good cook, housekeeping helpful. NO JOKE, dont answer unless you're serious. Call LOW DOWN payment, INFORMATION on assumable Utah ALASKAN and OVER$280 monthly, housing, SEAS Jobs, $20,000 to 8 $50,ooo per possible. Call Dept. 1927. year Business 3 A r Subscribe 250-794- 2. 8 Find Out What It Happening MM Go fthc TDr.lGG SO. A Tear I I NAME 966-333- 8 I I I I I SECOND HAND BEN'S, 7888 250-266- West tilizing, tilling. Call the meantime we are a trailer and open daily 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. We BUY, TRADE. SELL and TFN chest type early American dinette set, early American 15' cubic deep freezer, sofa, french provential sofa and end tables, gold framed mirror upright freezer, and other misc. items. 250-681- 5. the, 968-195- otherwise thinking HAMP'S trans-Atlanti- c e I . en CUSTOM INTERIORS and wall Finest quality covering. Painting photographers into "photodroids. Just point and shoot. You need never worry about the relationship between lens Newfoundland is known for the first aperture and shutter speed in obtaining a properly cable connecting it to Ireland in 1858 and the first exposed photograph. You need never learn about wireless message received, from England, m 1901. the pecu jarities and intricacies of light. In fact, when shooting a program SLR, all you need to learn is when not to shoot. If the light is so low (or so bright) that the camera cant produce a combination of lens aperture and shutter speed AMERICAN DREAM OF HOME for a proper exposure, it will indicate that with a beep or a blink or some other signal not even a OWNERSHIP COHO UP 10 SMOKE? complete camera copout could ignore. It be honest--thperfect opportunity to kill If you don't have $5,000, $1 ,000 or photography, to stop it in its tracks. Why bother when we can leave it all up to the learning $100 for a down payment, Call camera? Yet, Chuck Lee at Miles Homes. suspect beginning photographers will bother learning . and for many of the same reasons people everywhere bother learning anything. Because its there to be learned. And in this remarkably comthe more we know-evbetter we plex computerized world of ours-tbecome. As an afterthought, the new program cameras may turn out to be the best thing to happen to serious photography in a long, long while, it so happens that would no more consider shooting a camera in the "program" mode than would entering my Ford van at Le Mans. But think about this: Someone who knows absolutely nothing about photography and is, in fact, scared to death of the simbeast goes out to buy a camera-somethiple to operate, something for family snapshots. To make a visual record of the kids growing up. To record that trip to the Orient. For whatever reason. At first, a 110 cartridge camera seems best. It's small, lightweight, and simple to operate. But, on the debit side of the ledger, it simply cant produce sharp enlargements of 8 x 10 inches or more. And it doesn't take 35 mm film, the cheapest and most widely availahlp of all film formats and he auto-exposur- Mapirao Yofincn S. Magna, Utah 84044 Phone e I I once-in-a-lifetim- I & plans, garden, lawn, seeds, shrubs, trees, feryard clean-up- , ng SIGNATURE SI 24 W 2700 e auto-exposur- -- . 328-328- 7 6 p.m. Free estimates. ZIP- e I GROW. New 2,400-sq- . ft. building going up, but 966-628- 7 -- manual-exposur- US WHILE WE in in e auto-exposur- in-ho- misc. We've probably got it. TV's, stereos, radios, toys, bikes, sleighs, I e money, contact Dave at an authorized servicee center for and makes many also We models. specialize in photographic course, that was wrong. cant I It turns out, of count the number of students Ive taught who began shooting the formidible SLR with the camera set on auto, only to graduate to manual-exposurphotography with time. It seems that once a person grows comfortable with an SLR, he very often gets more daring. He begins wondering why theres a override system on the camera. He wants to know what it can do that autoexposure cant. Well, suspect the same will turn out to be true of the newer "program cameras. These cameras, pioneered by Canon and Minolta, choose correct aperture and shutter speed. Think about that for a moment. All the photographer need do is set the camera on program mode, point, focus, and shoot. Whats the proper aperture? He need never worry about it. Whats the right shutter speed? He need never know. It seems the perfect opportunity, once again, to turn you Looking for something? South, PARDON dropouts. are contemplating the purchase of a Sewing Machine and are interested in saving If Sewing Machine repair. LOFTHOUSE Landscape 2100 reasonable prices. Call after Gerry at STATE REPAIRS 250-699- workmanship I I T I I I ADDRESS I I 4220 WEST 602-998-04- 4-- 967-547- 6. assorted boys, sizes, under $5. KEARNS CLOTHES CLOSET 5476 SOUTH 250-777- 3, 250-251- s Magna. Call BEAUTIFULand highly Jean and Sporexciting numleave name and tswear shop of your own. ber. $12,500 to $16,500 includes inventory, fixtures, WOULD like to lose training, one paid airfare to Apparel Center and more, weight, maintain weight, as Over 100 nationally known no drugs, minimal effort at The obelisks known ClenpjVas needles were ac- - brands such as Levi, Lee, 3 home. Call tually set up nearly 15 Cavin Klein, Jor. be,ore aeopatra dache, Zena. Call now! STOP smoking in five centJ"' rn' Pacesetter Fashions, Inc. 1 days Do you use cigarettes 5 to reward yourselves? Do to smoke calm you your nerves? Would you rather die than be without NICE FAMILY HOME 4-cigarettes? Do you really APPLIANCE REPAIR New kitlike to smoke? Are you bdrm, WHIRLPOOL new and Ken-mor- e chen, room, family ready to give yourself a gift of love and good health? large lot with good garwashing machines and electric dryers. Call us, our program works. den spot. 250-681- 5 Very reasonable. Call Money bade guarantee. 328-094- LEVIS-Girl- s, e |