Show m k4mtr m&flidm Ah Monday March 29 2004 l' fc J A4 ' iVfttfu A a - The Herald Journal A Commentary OHIO HIGHLY SMIPER SUSPOT CIPTURE- - Mean girls seems an overhyped stereotype By Madora Kibbe For The Christain Science Monitor 66 A Yes there are mean has always been a slippery slope best navigated by keeping your bead down and putting one fool in front of the other My time iii middle school was no picnic I‘m sure yours wasn't a walk in the park either you had friends you worried about losing them if you didn't you thought you'd never have them Classes were too hard or way ' tK) easy Nothing made sense and I everything was unfair Have gotten it right so far? To make matters worse in my case 1 transferred midyear from a sweet little private schiiol to a large public one where all the kids (und I mean all the kids) look an instant dislike to me I was teased ostracized even beaten up — for three years So when J hear that today's girls are meaner than in my day all I can say girls just as there are mean boys But this characteristic is not genetic it's generic Happy people don’t act this way Unhappy insecure people tend to bully others 1 1 is started about MTV) perpetuate and glamorize such behavior am tired of many things Reality low-cshows jeans mania Especially and mean-gimania I'm tired of the mean-gitrend that says not only are girls bad but bad is good or at least a good way to get attention As if the only choice a girl has today is to be mean or meaningless We used to have books like “Reviving Ophelia’ Now I'ni expecting a title like “Drowning Ophelia — as told by her best 1 low-carbdi- ut rl Cincinnati post mm rl "noway” For me the dark night ended as nights always do — gradually I made friends in the older grades found mil it w as OK — even good — to be alone And eventually in high school all the kids that didn't like me suddenly did Cio figure So how is my daughter's generation different? Are the Gen-Y- s any worse than the Boomers? How’s my daughter doing compared with me? The answer is better than expeeted despite all the eurrcht claims that girls arc just plain mean But (hough it's never been easy to be 13 1 believe these days it's even harder For one thing positive role models are few and far between I don't know what to call Britney' Spears but role model isn't at the top of my list For another our American culture's gone overboard into the ocean of mean Reality shows are really all about cruelty You're fired you're : Is Bush to blame for G W Bush ought to be ' impeached their and Everybody grandpa warned the president that was going to hijack airplanes on Tuesday morning Sept 11 2001 to destroy the World Trade Center and gouge a hole in the Pentagon Yet the Republican did nothing to prevent the attacks to spare the lives of nearly 3000 innocents That's the impression one gets from news accounts of hearings this week by the federal commission investigating j da ' theSeptil attacks It's as or barbs or claws if Osama bin And yet the myth of mean prevails like so many other urban and subur-- -' ban legends Facts are often mislead- to the ing they don't always add up ' Laden dropped Bush an detailing his plan to remake' the Manhattan skyline and the commandcr-in-chie-f just shrugged it off There clearly is an effort afoot by those who would like to see Bush turned out of office — including one suspects most cf the reporters coyer- ing the 91 1 commission hearings to raise doubts in the minds of the American people about the president's prosecution of the war bn ter- "Tri-uinp- 1 : : - I : - : ror- The Bush haters fear that if the presidential election is won or lost on the issue of terror the Republican 7 will prevail showare worried by surveys They ing that Americans believe that Bush would do a better job fighting terror- ism than John Kerry the Democratic presidential nominee (by a landslide 56 percent to 33 percent margin according to the latest Newsweek poll) So the president's detractors are trying to turn Sept 11 around on him They are disinforming the pub- - ' lie that Bush somehow had advanced knowledge of the terror attacks hut ' did Jittle to nothing to stop them Of course that's an absurd notion:' terror attacks almost The Sept certainly would have occurred whether Bush was in the White House or AIGcire That’s because al- ' Qaida w as girding for holy war ' long before Bush was swom'into office 1 Bush-hatin- ve 1 against-Americ- 1 ’ 'counter-terroris- Cvvispftjs&tX'' c o?cV6'- I AttCbWoF-- ' 0PPd?TUNtr( It TUfcY flLUtN&TtXE to &&: : - al da - - Union-Tribu- mass-murderi- ng 1 1 y Product er 'on USsoil' ' Arid no one's attacks have been more outrageous more unfair than Richard Clarke's the former Bush' ' f his m y ' appearance last week 7 Commission Clarke the Clintonite claimed that the Democratic president had During before the 91 born-aga- WSmlll express opin- administration adviser who served in a similar capacity inthe Clinton udministra-tio- n counter-terroris- The Herald Journal may 1 in ions that do not align exactly with your own If you dis-- ‘ agree please respond with a letter to the editor or contact editor Charles McCollum abdut a possible guest' commentary (Phone: 752-2- 1 21 Ext! 320 cmccollumOhjnewscom): See information' box at bottomof page for more details Not) OJH GTNBT PNNft? Nb UP PiNfk'' I — s f- S 9f ' Si ' 1 po PPOCN- :IMKION4 i fbR TVkWWT oF TWNGr J ' The Opiraon page is inwided to acquaint ' readers with a vanety ol viewpoints on matters !of puMc nhportance and provide members ol the community with a fonim tor thetr views 'Personal columns cartoons and letters from readers reflect the opinions ot their writers and creators Editorials under the heading "Our : VreW represent the views of the Herad Journal ' editorial board Members of the editOnel bpan) V 7" DARREll EHRUCkcity editor': CINDV YURTHfeatures editor ‘ BRUCE SMtTtVpubtehef CHARLESMcCOELUMmanagmg - “RUffit conclusions are ffl Herald Journal otX m five-fol- Non'Seqiiitur &£ o m da ail 1 counter-terroris- pre-empti- 2001 terror truth1 And as far as acts of meanness go w ho should shoulder the blame? No ' 1: The girls themselves No 2: Our pop culture for holding up meanness ' ' as a cool r way to behave 3 No And be the has to wa to ferry our kids around the culprit got — the parents I know we don't like sjioals of adolescence than to simply to tukcthe blame' hut sometimes slmig aiulsas they 'll get through it We've just got to Arc we so conhe kidv that were mean to me weren't all bad But they were galva-liie- d cerned about our kids having friends that we don't teach them the impor- by a inoh mentality: It cun It tance of being it friend? to cun adults happen pen to kidv li I read iSee vIordol the Flies” and anaiticje in which an 8- ol the- - Will:")-7 was quoted as saying ”1 d year-olJim think about all the hasty things was a girl who wanted to he popular and I would step on anylnxly to be 7 that used tobe considered acceptable' ' popular” Where did she get the idea segregated base's: book burnings that so was 'the Spanish liKjuisilion: cow tipping being popular important? Did anyone take the lime to tell her V()K sonic people still think cow- tip that some of the best people arc pin g is all right but a growing num- herol us don't and iHir voices will extremely unpopular because they cure more about doing the right thing 'he heard VV1 point is: We get what ' than wearing the right thing? ' we put up wiih Not being popular is hard but 1 Joli t think this hypermedia focus' think being popular is worse Being tin Mean (iirl Ssndroiiie js helping about image that you concerned so the On il's either matters Contrary end up empty Or to quote Gertnide almost making it hip'tii be unkind Stein "there's no there there" Books like '‘Giflfigiiting” and Mother Teresa Rosai Parks Nelson "Quceti Bees and Wannabes" while locus' far too much Mandela Gandhi Buddha Jesus IVeiu on the problem while shedding They were servants of mankind not1 the solution liilJe on slaves to fashion: And not a bully in hght very the hunch- Npw that’s a crowd I'd Moyies like the upcoming "Mean ' fiiiis'aiul TV slio ws that' portray like to hang with kids' a s ys liicalaml sniping ijust ' about any television show aimed at ' Madora McKenzie Kibbe is a freelance teens today and don'l even get me writer’ “no higher priority" than fighting terror ' Conversely Terror was “an imporissue but not an urgent issue” to tant Had Clinton responded Bush charged Clarke who is pimpto that first attack upon ing a new book (previewed on CBS’ “60 Minutes" which shares the the World Trade Center same parent company as the book’s the way Bush respondpublisher) that skewers the Republi- can president: ed to the second Clarke's politically (not to mention maybe the second financially) motivated deconstruction never would have of Bush administration policy was reported without occurred g qualification by much of the media And if Osama's terror network was So what many Americans may not to be thwarted before it could exeknow is that in 2002 before Clarke cute its attacks on New York City was passed over for deputy secretary gnd Washington DC the measures should have been of Homeland Security he' told ' taken during the eight years that Bill reporters “there was no plan on that was pasiwd from the ClinClinton was in the Oval Office Indeed in 993 a terror attack on ton administration to the Bush administration" the World Trade Center killed six So the Bush administraition was people and injured more than 1 000 Had Clinton responded to that first left to devise Its own attack upon the World Trade Center policy which included among the way Bush responded to the sec- -' other measures the laudable plan “to ond maybe the second never would increase CIA resources for covert have occurred action d U) go after al- In 1998 the US embassies in Qaida" according to Clarke Kenya and Tanzania were attacked During the days weeks and ' ' Intelligence agencies attributed the months following the Sept 1 1 terror attacks to bin Laden Clinton limply attacks Americans were united in responded by lobbing a few cruise grief united in the resolve expressed missiles at a reputed terrorist camp in by Bush to "bring our enemies to ' Afghanistan and a suspected chemi-cor bring justice justice to out eneplant in the’ Sudan r' mies” In 2000 suicide bombers linked to Tin) bad that national unity has attacked the USS Cole the ' given way to ugly election-yea- r poliNavy destroyer anchored inYemeiy tics ' Clinton failed to retaliate at all to that terror attack Joseph Perkins is a columnist for The San Djego and can be So it was little wonder that Osama ' reached atO Joseph PerkinsUnion and his jihadis felt ' Tribcom emboldened to carry (Hit the Sept tenor attacksThey had little fear of ' strong American reprisal: 7 ' That is why it is so outrageous so This column and unfair to blame the Bush adimnistru-- 1 other personal ' y tion for the worst-eyterror! attack columns 66 I But it doesn't tell the whole story not by a long shot Yes there are mean girls just its there are mean' boys But this characteristic is not genetic it’s generic Happy people don't act this way Unhappy insecure people tend to bully others And by people I mean adults as weil as kids We shouldn't tolerate bullying anywhere — not in the workplace or the schixil yard But we do in' a way when we make a joke of it Or say ’ it's just part of growing up Not all girls do this Most girls don’t do this Most are fully capable of having friendships Without strings dumped you're tricked orsome-time- s you're coerced into swallowing bugs What's a teenager to do? The media's serving up nasty on a roll aiid we're eatiiig it up-- ' It's not cas being mean: it takes a lot of energy — energy that could be jived to study or help others or read a book But there 'sgot to be a better ' By Joseph Perkins friend" 9-1-1? ' ' editors The Herald Journal welcomes letters to the Potentially libelous' or otfensive letters wilt not be published however knd the editor reswves the ngtit to edit all letters to conform to the length ard styie requirements of the newspaper'-' 7 V lettets' shoirfdbe ' ty ' Typewntteoanddoubte-spaced- ! 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