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Show THE HERALD FACE TWO - LOGAN, UTAH- - SATURDAY, JOUIINAL, OCTOBER Herald-Journ- A Seri pps-- voice: "Say, you poor egg, when I would be no more do we eat surprised. .Of course languageri is not necessary between the By HILL BILLY cat and me: I understand nor Dcrteetly "lthou human speech bur it wo id be rather amazing can live next at that. I understand that old Of course you ' rnnm to man Baal.im was somewhat door to a man. or next when his ass spoxc nothin astounded know and him. in a city In the boguinin; was tne would hardly anu tin Logos was with about him, but you live in frgos, God, and the Logos WAS GOD suspect that one couldbeside a the hills for years Logos, not wo'd, but primal Know enspirit, primal force, neighbor and scarcely write. and that he could read tms Green ergy. Modern scienceno with its farther lias gotten Should you see a electrons than this phitcscphic Jew ol neighbor of mine attir.-- in Week-da- y al Humor Afternoon Published every week day afternoon, except legal holidays, at 75 West Center street, Logan, Utah, by Cache Valley Newspaper Co., N. Gunnar matter at the postoffice Rasmuson, president, and entered as second-clas- s Logan, Utah, under the act of March 3, 1879. Subscription price in Cache 50 the year In advance, by carrier $3 50 a year in adValley by mail, $2 vance or 40 cents the monu. Outside Cache Valley, by mull $5.00 the year, lloudy tunes.' Some of modern football stadiums are so big that spectators sitting at the south end are in the tropics and persons sitting at the north end are just two miles this side of the Arttic cirtlu--e "Proclaim liberty thruout the land" Gilman, Nicoll & Ruthman, Special Representatives San Francisco office, 525 Market Et.; Chicago ofiice, 410 N. Michigan Ave.; New York office, 19 W. 44tli St.- -' Buston office 18 Tremont St.; Detroit ofiice, 001 New Center Bldg, cle. R. W. MARTIN, Advertising Manager THU TRUTH QUICK Neither tins newspaper, nor any of its stockholders or ofllciuls lias any connection whatever, directly or indirectly, with any political party, public utility, real estate piomo- tion or other private business except the publication of newspapers devoted solely to dis- interested public service. The The unusually heavy primary vote, not only in Logan, but in many other sections of the state, 'is a true reflection of human nature. In times of prosperity, people are pione to let the government take its course. They are prosiienng, the government is good. But as business slumps and a depression hits the country, the citizens of the y voice their protest against conditions through ballot. OBSERVER BY JIM MARSHALL n i ij-- t:KKt. "If I was a dictator for a dictates Rodney Smith day short and sweet "Id dig Out that five billion worth of irozen gold bais back In the treasury "and saw em up and divvy 'em around among the proletariat and then the depression would vanish like radio listeners when a boprano comes on deVno-crac- the . It is sale to say that a good percentage of, these .people are unacquainted with conditions that have brought about a depression and aie as unfamiliar with conditions that will start the countiy upwards once more. But they voice their protest against existing I little a simple enough scheme and one calculated to draw loud shrieks of terror frum all the financial boys but lust about as good as any other conditions throughout the polls. Many experienced jiohtical observers are predicting a complete and sweeping change through tiie United States at the national election next fall. Unless conditions take a sudden upward turn before that time, it seems to be a safe prediction. Undoubtedly, one of the largest votes in the history of a presidential election will be cast next fall. It is unfortunate that human natuie is this way. If the citizens of the United States would guard their sovereign rights through a liberal and intelligent use of the ballot, they could at least smooth out the rough spots of the business cycle although it is doubtful if anything can prevent the rise and fall of world movements as a matter of fact a great deal of the gold is circulating now by proxy onlj we carry around gold certificates (some of us) instead of the yellow ships the golden bars are merely supposed to be collateral for the paper money in cumulation or what is called circulation these days but of course for all practical purposes they might just as well be dumped into the middle of the Pacific Of course FEDERAL JOBS OPEN a safe bet that millions of The United States Civil Serpeople who carry around paper money dont even know that vice commission has announced It's gold and silver to back it are stored away they accept the money Just as they accept a check which they assume has gold and silver to back it in a bank some where that if the only thing Is all the checks were cashed tomorrow and all bank ors wanted their money there wouldnt be enough to go i around 0pen competitive examinations as follows: Assistant supervisor of nurses, chief nurse, head nurse, Indian servic; graduate nurse, visiting duty, various services. 30, Closing date,- - December 1931, except that the commisreserves the right to ission sue , subsequent notice closing the receipt of application before that date. Social ,woi ker ( psycluatrn i , $2,000 a year, junior soeial worker. $1,800 a year, Veterans Administration. Closing date, December 30, 1931. exrethat the commission cept serves the right to issue subsequent notice closing the receipt cf applications before that date. Assistant supervisor of probation. $2,900 to $3,500 a year. Bureau of r Prisons, department of justice.: Closing date, November 17, 1931. Senior surveillance inspector, $2,000 a year, junior surveillance inspector, $1,620 a year, ordinance department at large, war department Closing date, . November 17. 1931 Associate naval architect, a yea- -, assistant naval architect, $2,600 a year. Bureau of Construction and Repair. and Coast Navy department, Guard, (treasury department. November 17, 1931. Closing date, AH states except Delaware, Iowa. Idaho. Maryland, Vermont, Vuginia. and the District of Columbia, have received less than their share of appointments rn the apportronai department service at Washington, D C. Full information may be obtained from Albert O Anderson, secretary of the United States civil service board of examiners at the post office In this city. What people cant get thru is that money isnt wealth money is only the chips in the game and you could dump all of it into the sea tomorrow and the world wouldnt be any poorer it would be inconvenienced for a while because it would have nothing to trade with and would have to invent new chips but thats all the difference it would make their heads : Well, theres anyway chance cf Rod Smiths no bulllon-diwyin- g scheme coming to pass and nobody would be any better off if it dm so hed better tiiink up a new one prosperity isn t made by the amount of money there is but by the speed with which it , circulates a nation with little circulation of money is just like a jnan with the same complaint AND, LISTEN Schemes or Ho schemes times will get better when people start to spend 'money and keep on spending it and not before. $3.-2- Our Own West . Its Romantic History This is IVIarmaduke J. Bleep, n o ted eoacli. who was barred today from in-- t e r collegiate football for un b p o rtsmaniike t a etics. Mr. Bleep is charged with to suf-fora- te . AI morning El Paso's two Is It Ever banquets, why does some durn bore Gel up and talk five hours or more? Hell, get this reason through At little log cabin, which he helped his father to build; Yom Nippur was a general in theur Japanese army; Federal serve is a reserve where feder- dome, lle talks there cause he cant al emptojees hnnt wild game; Maneuver is what they put on talk at home! grass; the prairies are vast Switzerland has decided not plains covered with treeless forto send a team to the 1932 ests; Malays are brown people Olympic Games at Los Angeles and inhabit Malaria; Rome was This ought to cinch Americas overthrown by invasions of the chance to win the Swiss bell- liuns, Visigoths and Osteopaths; the revolution in India is being ringing events. led by Manhattan Dandy; the .. plural cf monocle is binnacle; the Ford is a fine car, with a OUIt OWN ETIQUETTE DEPARTMENT good body and excellent chaos. nt silver, bought all his money would buy. Then he rushed to the other building at 80 cents. and unloaded . The .El- - Paso Daily Times thought it was too good a Joke to pass up although the barks loss was small Joe only made a few trips before ofllciuls noticed their error so it spread the story of Joes winnings all jover Its front page. Meanwhile Joe threw a party ' 'at Si Ryans Ranch saloon. lost not only his winnings but his summer wages besides. 75-ce- j old-time- rs than that. The wood duck carries her young around by seizing them Ty loose skin on the nape of jthe neck, much in the manner Lf a cat carrying a kittem Too just what you make it. Sav- 6 O 118 North Main, Logan, Utah Evcrton lias your talk yet? Young Father: My, yes, teaching him to keep quiet, now. Bovs and Men are that When you teach wav them to do a thing thev are apt to over do it. A lot of them have learned to eat waffles recently and now they would like waffles every morning. Why not humor them. Waffles are easy to make it you have a good electric w&lfle non. and a good cTerti ic waffle iron costs only a small amount at Evcrtons. were . . . safety for an officer of this bank on any financial problem. tfhe FIRST NATIONAL BANK UTAH Member of the Federal Reserve System That wonderful candy LAXettes, is famed for the way that it gets The best of our ills. And saves doctor bills. WHICH VIRTUES NO USER FORGETS. (1st prize winning last line) $50.00, sent by Mrs. Sarah E. Peterson, Preston, Idaho. 2nd prize, $25.00, $Irs. Verl Daniels, Montpelier, Idaho, for (Thus sating us useless regrets.) l U A RY SAFETY-STEE- BODY TRANSMISSION PLYMOUTH BY DeSOTO, ks 8rd prize, $10.00, Rebecca Hickman, 380 West 1st North, Logan, Utah, for (Banishing sickness, worry and debts). Rh prize, $5.00, Edith Stoddard, Richmond, Utah, for (Shall we give them a trial? Yes, lets!) 5th prize, $5.00, Mrs. Kenneth Pitcher, Smithfield, Utah, for (Ive tried them, and have no regrets.) 6th prize, $5.00, M. Liljenquist, Box 73, Hvrum, Ltah, for (For wise people, both blondes and brunettes.) 1st. Originality counts, avoid the obvious 2nd Suggestions for contestants. Last line should rhyme with first two lines and should be of about the' . 3rd, If the name LAXettes appears in the bodv of the limerick its use in the last line is redundant. We appreciate the interests shown and the laige number of entries in the contest, and hope that all will find LAXettes everything claimed for it LAXettes are now on sale at W. F. Jensen Confectionery, and all drug stores in Logan, aftu cost only 25c a box. same-length- 3 7 6 CHRYSLER AND DODGE DEALERS . Lim-A-ric- WATCH FOR OUR NEXT LIMERICK PRIZE CONTEST. DOUBLE DROP FRAME SOLD M Friend. "And baby learned to LAXETTES is a laxative candy, UTAH MADE, effective and handy, It saves doctor bills, Gets the best of our ills, In a way that is certainly dandy. Winners of Limerick Contest Ending October 15th, 1931 HYDRAULIC BRAKES . ANfU-i.- iiv W. You are cordially invited to confer with LAX ettes FREE WHEELING EASY-SHIF- BUILDING & LOAN ASSOCIATION foundation principle of safety the funds of our depositors. LOGAN. FLOATING POWER Ao.ifrJI-o-- O dumb-lookin- Reaction FOR THE WORLD'S MOST WITH SAFETY matures 2000 in 185 months. Payments of $10 a month. -- Action and A conservative policy of banking, over a period of 39 years, is the key to the present financial strength of this institution. All the services we offer are solidly built on the Plymouth gives to each New Plymouth buyer a Service Policy which is a model of definiteness, thoroughness and liberality, This policy specifies that any defect t f niatcnals"er workmanship will lie made gpod without an charge cither for labor or parts for a period of 90 days or 400(3 miles. It provides fui thcr for tour free servicings at 500, 1500, 2'0n and 4000 miles covering a long list of inspections, adjustments and Other sci vice operations. Come m and 1ft us show you this. New Plymouth service policy. H COSTLY CRIME The Wickersham Commission crime places the yearly cost of in the United States at more Criminal law than $1,124,000,000. 300 cities acadministration in counts for $247,700,000 of this 4 amount. of Conservative Banks that tomato MODERN MOTOR CAR Late rs The Strength MODERN SERVICE PLAI j i WFBSTER P. T. A. The Webster School Parent-Teacheassociation met Monthe school. Alday evening at bert Webber was in charge of Music was fur- the meeting nished by a double mixed male Prayers were offeredr. quartet. Glau-scby H. P. Howell and Fred Miss Anna Page explained couise Parent Teacher the which is outlined for study for this year. Where it came from; The Latin petulans, antis, properly, exegesis An amazing situation' Should making slight attacks upon, Pollyanna. the black cat, mount from a lost diminutive chest at dawn some mornto fall upon, to attack. petere, my and announce in a shrill ing Windsor Castle in England has gardens covering 70 acres, of which 23 are devoted to vegetables. There is one flower border which is 200 yards long and 15 feet wide on each side of a grass walk. to-w- it: more Alexandria. . was Perc Westmore. the make-u- p wizard, took Barbaia Stanwyck over a span of years ranging from 25 to 65. r But the stock market took a lot of stars .over the pan for insolent Ants. the apartment house dwellers of Natureland, have many peculiarities. Probably one of the most remarkable is their ability to endure under water-Therevive quickly after being in the water many minutes. If left in the water for an extended time their recovery is much slower but they can do it. Ants have been known to revive after being under water for a whole day. Then, however, they are so weakened they soon die. Efforts to drown them from their homes are usually unsuccessful. The temporary covering of water has no effect on the ants unless It is to make them bolder and more numerous. they n The word: Petulant. What it means; Capriciously fretful: characterized by ill- natured freakishness; Irritable-NoRare; Forward; immodest; wanton; pert, saucy and Natureland- - for ings Plan am! stick to it. Regular into a Federal Building and Loan Savings Account will prove. to ou succeed. that it is never too late-t- G Who' threw they time n Talkie Trips- - We knew that the British would eventually dig up some secret scandal m Mr. Gandhis past. It is now divulged that Gandhi once practiced law in South Africa. Miss ts ' Re-vo- Miss Tillie Talcum, noted expert on social usuages, antonounced day that it By LLEWELLYN MILLER is perfectly form good for a wife to ProHol.ywood . . , Argus read a newsductions have had a company paper at the tascouting around the country breakfast ble. A newsshooting m points for their paper, nut "Ghost Towns' Talcum, affords a . wife they an were in Au-- r shieldeffective when o r a, Nev., her husband spent eats grapesome fruit. She also makes faces be searching it without being seen, the old home of hind when her husband starts crabTwain. mark bing about the size of the Finally grocery bill. found the little monthly Photo by Evan Hancey. house in which "RoughThe chief argument against in It teaching the Constitution in written long ago t in the days the schools is that children when Aurora was one of the would become radical and grow toughest mining towns in the up to demand all the liberties west. the Constitution guarantees. Now the place is deserted, DIARY with the exception of one or (October 23 two who have clung By gasoline chaise home, and thru the years. to reading a book yclept Still One old woman was an inter- More Boners. which do be anested spectator .while the com- other voiumnr of blunders made was at work. pany by schoolboys ins examinations, ."Were you familiar with the and they mighty merrie, Mark Twain who used to live Abraham Lmioln was born in asked here? the camerman her. You fresh city .fellers are ail alike! she retorted hotly. Ive seen Aurora wide open, but I never was familiar with anyone in my life! aunts to those who set a tegular crepancy. Joe got into action. He rush-- ! ed into the bank which quoted is a Cinematters To SUCCEED? Stints, Yuutla laughed, Sarge There I was, bawling him out plenty and he just sat dumb and couldnt think of anything to call me. SPEAKING TUB-DINN- Ws. Gold and silver represented the medium of exchange Each opposing teams by ins structing h linvmet to eat eailie five minutes befoie tne start of the game. Photo by W. H f Paper money was seldom seen In El Paso. Texas, back in the hanks would post the current price of Mexican silver. It fluctuated between 75 and 80 cents. One morning the banks differed. In one bank's window, Mexican silver was listed at 80 cents; at the other bank it was quoted at 75. Into town with his summers wages of several hundied dollars came Texas Joe and as he headed first for the bank he Immediately noticed the dis- ( FROM GRIDIRON SPORT! t .slo.m-in- g derby hat and umUtlla, around after a mess of woolies, you would regard him as just another a Knowing him as I do for eer.tleman and a shrewd fellow, vet I did not suspect the of a classical education. This Hellenic sheep tender tapped on the snack door when I was in the th"oes maybe -c- omposition of literary and I yelled Come IN and he came in and sat him down and looked about as dumb as usual. c As I wa finishing my remarks I shouted over my shoulder: Is aoba the Greek word for father Certainly, abba, abba, labal, father, father, country." In the Greek chanu ters the words look very alike. One thing led to anotner and finally the word Logos came up. My Greek neighbor immediately rambled off a string of Greek and I cocked my dumfounded ear and requested him to that slowly. "Is not tnat the first verse of the Cospel of St. John? I asked; it wa-- . Probably that was the only verse of the Greet Nev Testament that I could have placed. Thats how much value a yrar Testament New of College Greek is to a fellow. The first verse of St. John I remember because it has always seemed to me the spiritual basis of what we term Christianity. So next there came up the influence of Neo Platonism on and tne early Christianity probability that. John was written by a philosoohie Jew of Alexandria somewhere in. the second century A D. Durn if g the sheep Yellow hadn't been well grounded in lel-iu- w 1- -2 DEPRESSION ANI) THE VOTE UTrLruririj"i j, t . Football Pests If he yells, "Get up youre yellow1 when a football player is knocked out. the chances are he wears a 12 collai and grows taint when a goldfish snaps at him. LOGOS By George Clark; 77 an field Newspaper C Every 1931. , SIDE GLANCES The 24, 'X LAXETTES COMPANY, LOGAN UTAH. f |