Show THE 68 OUR EDUCATIONAL COLUMN THE UNIVERSITY " We went through the Deseret University the other day This is not the first time we have been through a university We saw a number of the pupils practicing while others were deeply penmanship We noticed engaged in penwomanship' that the Principal keeps an eye on the large girls That’s right We think the You Professor is in a trying situation We went through see he is not married all the various departments of the UniverThe sity including the Menagerie to is the of University supposed Principal know more than the rest but— we don’t know how it was we forgot to ask “ Who Owned the Jewels ?” By the bye there’s another question we would like to ask the Professor that is who that handsome young lady is who usually stands in the doorway looking at us as we pass by ? KEE PDA PITOHININ of the Keepapitchinin I am desirous of having my portrait got up in a superior style by Savage & Ottiner and published in that journal— that is if you can induce the proprietors to undertake it” I informed him I would do it on one He was naturcondition and one only I ally anxious to know what that was told him if he would sign his initials warranting it to be correct I would see that it was published (I hope I have not over stepped my authority in this matter ) He cheerfully acceded to my request although not having signed his name lately he was a little out of practice I consecable' the quently send you by the only authentic likeness of Frederick sub-mari- Muscatine Iowa has a man who offers to wager that 'he can whip- any dog in town with his teeth He proposes to have his hands tied behind him - A crowd gathered at the Pique (Ohio) railroad station the ether day to see Gen Grant As the train was movingjoff an old gentleman asked: “Who did they say that man is?” “That is Gen Grant our President” “Oh” said the old fellow “it is is it? Well stranger you see I’ve not been about town much and don’t pay much attention to the newspapers and know but little about these things VY hat might his politics be?” ADYJE RXIS EM ENT8 As this is the only comic paper printed west of the Mississippi — dreu la tin g as it does extensively in almost every settlement in the Territory and to some extent in other States and Territories and even in Europe and Asia — being read by many thousands its value as an advertising medium can be appreciated —: THE A gentleman in Illinois who estimated that he was damaged $5000 by being run through another gentleman’s threshing machine has finally compromised for $200 WAR Special Dispatehetilo the Keeimpttch Inin from our own— Correspondent GOING! GOING!! GONE!!! Royal Council Chamber PIANO Only a few chancefe left Dont THAT to get the lucky numberwhich we are as- Berlin October 30 1870 sured is in th6 box at Mrs Colebrook’s You may never have another opportunity to purchase Editor Keepapitchinin : — Es ist Imran a Piano for $100 Rally Rally 11 zar halt hoyta —Excuse me I have been so mixed up in r the blood and carnage of STOVES 1 STOVESJ!! STOVES !!I these conflicting foreigners that I had M ALLEN & Co take this method of in- almost forgotten the fact that your readers that they have forming the world at one of the largest Stocks of large Stoves in the Terriare principally desirous to read the war tory of Utah including the celebrated Charter Oak and other superior Cooking Stoves which news in plain American English they are willing to dispose of on terms to suit the METZ has surrendered and the Prustunes sians have secured 150000 Chassepots J M Allen & Co and it is impossible to tell how many Opposite the Elephant East Temple St the other pots ana kettles to see piles of them on the King’s table you would think William extant As will he seen from the IT IS FREELY ADMITTED THAT the Germans are the finest soldiers and machinthe whole French nation had gone to pot engraving though advanced in he ists in the world -- HENRY RISER is a German Watchmaker and Jewele I have been in close quarters as you is a man of iron nerve whichyears If the work is not enables I shall him to withstand the shock of battle satisfactory— no charge He is not so heavy in will see by my previous letters and his as the other Prussians charges him avoid this in future as I have with me yet retain that Teas del & Co’s East Temple StreetTry sprightly appearance Near which covers which is so tfeodfaw:295 Lord Rosse’s telescope in the conspicuously apparent quite a scope of country picture CHINESE CHEAP EABOll PLAYED King William will not restHe satisfied Rustle OUT ! short of a crowning victory says he thousand industrious' wishing 4egan the war in order to knock Napoleon PARTIES to worka few for nothing and board off his pins and he will continue it for the J purpose of setting him up again He can’t understand what tne people are He wants to leave grumbling about why the things as he found themis this isfew thouIt true a war was declared sands are killed occasionally but Prussia is Some of the covering herself with glory troops think they have got pretty near enough glory to do them till after harvest The King he saysr says he “Rustle (he always leaves out the Lord John) I think you must be a pretty straight sort of a man or you would’ nt be in the emNow Hoo & Co ploy of Uno there are a great many of these papers professing to publish — of course portraits of me and the boys Now resizing as I they are unreliable do the extent of circulation and influence one-lior- A will do well to sendf6r'ltalian Bees clergyman in New York only a few themselves by the undersigned who starts for the East next since explained that “science must November ana will a so purchase and deliver or religion cannot go od” The Live Stock in this city on easy terms Address Newark Advertiser suggests that he stops Wm D ROBERTS Provo and allows some wiser teacher to occupy THEtKROWN PRINCE IS MARCHING the pulpit days stop - There was a refreshing directness in John’s solution of a theological problem propounded by his wife: “John do you think we shall know each other in heaven?” “Fes Do you think we shall be bigger fools there than here ?’ ’ Such a dry summer as the" present has not been known up in New Hampshire since John H Warland edited the Claremont Eagle some twenty-fivyears ago when he said it was so dry that he had to soak his pig to make him hold swill - He wU enter at Kelson’s Golden Gate where large stores of Kandy Kakesymd "Krackers are kept Khll kwickly before they are konsumed by the light "infantry on Paris kon-stant- ly IF YOU WANT YOUR JPUBT1T TAKEN with a high forehead and smiling go to Savage & Ottinger —— " MUSEUM AND MENAGERIE Gan See the Razorihat shaved BaniUm from 9 a m to 5 pm i |