Show T A VOL Paper Semi-Month- ly EE IE Devoted to Cents Scents SALT LAKE CITY FEBRUARY 2 Sense and nonsense 11871 23 NO Some of our citizens arc always “ railing ” at the road the cost of travel “U £7” hut Ajax says he came down from He' s a walker— ho relation to WaUcers Bitters) — said if they Ogden by rail the other day and it didn't cost him a cent had objected to his coming by rail he should probably have come by telegraph and got here sooner Ajax says they had an accident on the line when became downbutas good luck would have if fie 10 isn't “a board" You see there' s a great deal ofRailroad “stock" between here and Ogden Sometimes the cars run over the “stodc" and sometimes the “stock" run over the road v ' It seems on this occasion that some of the stock threw the train off the track Can't learn whether it was the imported stock brought in by Rydalch or the railroad stock At any rate the cars were obliged to stand “stock" still while the engine went on its way rejoicing This is an evidence to us that the’ train must have been attaclced in the rear Why can't the train be protected by placing the cow catcher on the latter end? Cattle are no more to be relied on than other follj they will “hook" things occasionally and owing perhaps to the freedom inaugurated bg the New Move ' each animal seems determined to go off on its own “hook" V ' "i r ' SKRAPS There was an almost universal “rising” The opening chapter of a western novel part of the inhabitants1 of New contains the following: “All of a sudden York last Saturday but it was only at the the fair girl continued to sit: upon the 4tA pound of flesh” — A prize 'fight usual hour of getting up sand gazing upon the - briny deep on whose heaving bosom the tall ships went The miscalled Century’plant is said to Get married young men and be quick Hence about by freighted— ah 1 whorcan tell bloom when it is' thirty years old it Don’t wait for the millennium merrily with how much of joy and sorrow and it should be called'the thirty per century for the become to You’d look girls il angels ' lumber and emigrant0 and hoops plant well beside an angel wouldn’t you you pine " and salt fish!” ' V blockheads?' ' Lieirig islike trieingltew hide in a fog— Conversation between an inquiring if yu move about yu’ re in danger uv “That’s a good gun of yours stranger strangerand a steamboat pilot: “That is Black Mountain?” bumping yure hed agin the truth and az but Uncle Dave has one that beats it soon az the fog blows oph yu are gone how far will it kill a hawk vrith “Ah sir “Yes highest mountain about ' ' ' 7 ' ' No’ 6 shot?” Lake George” ennyhow uv -- A J ' nj “I don’t use :shot or ball either” “Any story or legend' connected with n - v A dutiful son in Detroit’ has killed answered Uncle Dave for himself that mountain?’’ i v of jus neighbors’ cats to get money “Then what doybu use Uncle Dave?” “Lots of ’em Two lovers weDt up that to buy his mother a set of false teeth J “I shoot salt: altogether ' I- kill' my mountain once and' never ' came back He has made a quiet neighbourhood - V ik Va game so far with my gun that without again’’-- o: where once was a howling wilderness and salt the game would spoil before I could “Indeed Why what became of them?” Jthe old woman can now eat hearty “Went down on the other side get it” on the ' ' - ' - r ! - ‘ f ’ sixty-seve- r ‘ : |