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Show C2 The Emery County Review, Tuesday, October 28, 2008 The FAMILY PAGE Horoscope Focus On The Family Crossword Figuratively Speaking Focus on the Family Consistent Discipline is Key to Fixing Child’s Attitude Dr. James Dobson Q My 5-year-old is one of those rambunctious kids who gives us fits. There are times when I think he’s trying to take over the entire family. I’ve never really understood him before but I guess he just doesn’t want anyone telling him what to do. That is precisely how he feels. It is surprising how commonly this basic impulse of children is overlooked. Indeed, I think the really tough kids understand the struggle for control even better than their parents who are bogged down with adult responsibilities and worries. Children devote their primary effort to the power game while we grown-ups play only when we must. Some time you might ask a group of children about the adults who lead them. They will instantly tell you, with one voice, which grown-ups are skilled in handling them and which aren’t. Every schoolchild can name the teachers who are in control and those who are intimidated by kids. One father overheard his 5-year-old daughter, Laura, say to her little sister who A was doing something wrong, “Mmmm, I’m going to tell Mommie on you. No! I’ll tell Daddy. He’s worse!” Laura had evaluated the authority of her two parents and concluded that one was more effective than the other. This same child was observed by her father to have become especially disobedient and defiant. She was irritating other family members and looking for ways to avoid minding her parents. Her dad decided not to confront her directly but to punish her consistently for every offense until she settled down. Thus, for three or four days, he let Laura get away with nothing. She was spanked, stood in the corner and sent to her bedroom. Near the end of the fourth day, she was sitting on the bed with her father and younger sister. Without provocation, Laura It’s the week of Hecate’s moon -- the new moon in Scorpio that is closest to Halloween. This bewitching luminary asks us to honor the spirits, and it’s up to us to decide just how. Some will dawn a macabre mask, while others will be playful and sexy. Scorpio may be the sign of death and transformation, but that doesn’t mean we have to be heavy about it. Sometimes the thing that needs to die is an overly serious attitude. ARIES (March 21-April 19). You would reschedule a personal project to help out a friend, but you wouldn’t disappoint a friend in order to conduct your own personal business. Your selflessness turns out for the best early in the week, but don’t make it a habit. You need and deserve to make your own mission the most important one. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You’re trying to solve a big problem, and logic will only take you so far. It’s A John MacIntyre Week of October 26 your appreciation of art and poetry that will get your mind going in the right direction to glue together the pieces and, if not solve the mystery, at least accept and enjoy the fact that it cannot be solved. A Gemini speaks your soul’s language. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You’re not invested in whether or not others come around to your way of thinking. If they do, fine. If not, the diversity amuses you. Just because you decide to “live and let live” doesn’t mean others will. Hopefully those who don’t agree with you will not try to change your mind, though, which is an impossible feat. CANCER (June 22-July 22). A person who has been toxic toward you in the past will ask you, in their own funny way, for another chance. You still have a few emotional bumps and bruises leftover from the last time. When all is healed, you’ll give this person another shot. Until then, put yourself around people who Q stress-free environment. He doesn’t have to work or study or discipline himself. But it would be crazy to stay beyond the nine months intended. He can’t grow and learn without leaving the security of that place. His development will be arrested until he enters the cold world and takes a few whacks on his behind. It is to everyone’s advantage, and especially to the welfare of his mother, that he slide on down the birth canal and get on with life. So it is in young adulthood. Until you cut the umbilical cord and begin providing for yourself, you will remain in a state of arrested development. Remaining at home with Mom and Dad is the perpetuation of childhood. It may be time to put it behind you. (Dr. Dobson is founder and chairman of the board of the nonprofit organization Focus on the Family, Colorado Springs, CO 80995(www.family.org). Questions and answers are excerpted from “Solid Answers” and “Bringing Up Boys,” both published by Tyndale House. Copyright 2008 James Dobson Inc. Distributed by Universal Press Syndicate.) Figuratively Speaking Horoscopes by Holiday Holiday Mathis pulled the hair of the toddler who was looking at a book. Her dad promptly thumped her on the head with his large hand. Laura did not cry, but sat in silence for a moment or two, and then said, “Harrumph! All my tricks are not working!” This is the conclusion you want your strong-willed son to draw: “It’s too risky to take on Mom or Dad, so let’s get with the program.” I am 21 and also still at home. I am very comfortable there, and I plan to stay with my parents for a long time. Why not? Tell me why you think it is unwise to go on living where it is cheaper and easier than getting out on your own. There are individual situations when it makes sense to live with your parents for a longer time, and maybe yours is one of them. I would caution you, however, not to overstay your welcome. That would not be in your best interests or those of your folks. Remaining too long under the parents’ roof is not unlike an unborn baby who refuses to leave the womb. He has every reason to stay awhile. It is warm and cozy there. All his needs are met in that are sure to make you laugh. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). You like your relationships deep. However, this is no time to underestimate the importance of large networks with those you hardly know. It turns out you don’t have to get enmeshed in other’s lives to be successful in fun or business with them. Personal economics improve as you make light, friendly gestures. THIS WEEK’S BIRTHDAYS: In the past they said of you, “what a precocious child,” because you were so beyond your years. This year you catch up and even go in reverse. You’re younger than ever, finding new joy and innocence everywhere. November is a stellar month for your finances, although your income may not change much -- it’s your attitude about money and what it can buy that is different. Your love life gets a burst of magic in January. There’s a trip to look forward to in June. Lively nights fill Continued on Page C4. 70: Percentage of the very, Employee Benefit Research Institute. 29: Percentage of American workers who would call their boss a “friend” -- more than any other categorization, according to the Adecco USA “Workplace Insights” survey. very rich (those with a net worth of at least $30 million) who project their spending through the end of 2008 to be on par with or greater than last year, according to Elite Traveler/Prince and Associates research. 32: Percentage who said they were very knowledgeable about buying a home. 21: Percentage who would 96.4: Percentage of these 15: Percentage who said 6: Percentage who view super-rich consumers who plan to spend an average of $108,100 on jewelry and watches before the end of 2008. 97.6: Percentage of the su- per-rich who plan to spend an average of $77,300 on apparel and accessories before 2008 ends. 94: Percentage who plan to spend an average of $23,400 on the personal consumption of wines and spirits. Source: Elite Traveler. 40: Percentage of Ameri- cans ages 19 to 39 -- members of the so-called generations X and Y -- who said they were very knowledgeable about how to use an iPod, according to survey by they were very knowledgeable about eliminating or avoiding debt. 21: Percentage who said they were very knowledgeable about how to invest their money outside of the workplace. Source: EBRI. $600 billion: Estimated buying power of the burgeoning Asian-American market, which offers the most lucrative opportunities in the multicultural consumer market, according to research by Packaged Facts. 36: Percentage of Asian- American households that have an income of at least $100,000. 25: Percentage of Ameri- can families as a whole that have an income of at least $100,000. Source: Packaged Facts. call him/her a mentor. him/her as a confidant. Source: MWW Group. 40: Percentage of U.S. energy that is swallowed by buildings, though most Americans believe transportation and industry are the largest offenders, according to the U.S. Department of Energy. 27: Percentage of Ameri- cans who correctly identified buildings as the major energy culprit, according to a survey conducted by Owens Corning. 1, 2, 3: Ranks of buildings, industry and transportation as the primary users of energy. Source: Owens Corning. 45: Percentage of admin- istrative professionals who said having a bad boss would be the most important factor in a decision to leave their job, according to a survey conducted by the International Association of Administrative Professionals. 4: Percentage who indicated they would leave their job because of poor pay. 2: Percentage who would leave because of poor benefits. Source: IAAP. 57: When workers were asked the No. 1 issue facing the nation, percentage who cited the economy. Source: SnagAJob.com. 1, 2, 3: Ranks of The Joker, Batman and Iron Man/Tony Stark on the list of the top three Halloween costumes for men, based on movies released in 2008, according to a survey by Fandango. 1, 2, 3: Ranks of “The House Bunny” (Anna Faris), Fox (Angelina Jolie) from the movie “Wanted” and Hannah Montana (Miley Cyrus) on the list of the top three Halloween costumes for women. Source: Fandango. Idle Thought “It is also a victory to know when to retreat.” -- Erno Paasilinna, essayist. (Copyright 2008 John MacIntyre Inc. Distributed by Universal Press Syndicate.) Puzzle answers on Page C4. |