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Show - CANST THOU BEAT IT Consider the .editor! A child 19 born unto the wife of a merchant in the town. The physician getteth 35 plunks. The editor writetli a stick and a half and telleth the multitude that the child tippeth the beam at .tine pounds. Yea, he lleth even as centurion. And the proud father giv-eth giv-eth him a Cremo. Behold the young one groweth up and graduateth. ' And the editor put-teth put-teth into his paper a swell notice. Yea, a peach of . a notice. He telleth of the wisdom of the young woman and of her exceeding comeliness, Like unto the roses of STiaron is she and her gown is played up to beat the band. And the dressmaker getteth get-teth two score and four iron men. Arid the editor gets a note of thanks from the sweet' girl graduate. And the daughter goeth on a journey. jour-ney. And the editor throweth himself him-self on the story of the farewell party. par-ty. It runneth a column solid. And the fair one remembereth him from afar with a, picture postal card that costeth six for a jitney. Behold, she returneth, and the youth of the' town fall down and worship. She picketh one, and lo, she pi'cketh a lemon. But the editor calleth him one of our promising young men and getteth away with it. And they send unto the editor a bid to the wedding and behold, the bids are fashioned in a far city. Flowery and long is the wedding notice which the editor'printeth. The minister getteth 10 bones. The groom standeth the editor off for 12 months subscription.. I All flesh is grass and in time the 1 wife is gathered unto the soil. Thej minister getteth his bit. The editor i printeth a death notice, two column.) i of obituary, three lodge notices, a! cubit of poetry and a card of thanks. I And he forg-tteth to read proof on the dead and the darned thing com-eth com-eth out, "Gone to Her Last Roasting Roast-ing Place." And all that are akin to the deceased de-ceased jumpeth on the editor with exceeding great jumps. And they pulleth out their ads and canceleth ! their subs, and they swing the hammer ham-mer even unto the third and fourth! generations. ' j |
