Show and green truck but niggers is the most triflin'est- no‘COUntestlowklowri'bein’s oif the face of the livin’ yearth They haint one of tbese h’yur gol' no teeter-bird- s as runs round all the time a rstoopinVup behind- - I’ll show you the whar I hired one and stump give him his supper lodgin’ and breakfast' and lafter he eat breakfast he cut down that tree and then sloped Jest let a nigger eat as many new molasses as he wants and ride the gates and he’s happy ' as a lizard onto a rail “But I see a good many white folk's who if they are not riding the gate’s are at least' sitting in the house” “But the Secessioners gits all the land and the niggers gits all the work and that ’ar gives a po’ man ’casion jfur meditatin’ a good deal on his 'latter eend as the fel low said when he wuz settip’ onto a stump All them when he orto been grubbin things together makes the ile onto soup powerful thin like” “Would’nt white men make head better if they would not refuse to work in the field with negroes?” same v “But no' white man’s gwine to do it No white man Ifcts born into us stranger as respects hisself is ever gwine to do it fust He’ll be But come set up stranger and take a snook” be consulted about it— and if the fates demand that we be offered ‘up as a sacrifice on the 'altar of Hymen we would like to be present when the event transpires If there is one thing that wei fdread more than another it is' the idea of being married when we are not there ' ’n MRS OGDEN TO BR (Our wife dictated this last paragraph she’ says we should !have knocked him down on the spot W e told her we un: doubtedly should have done so but he was1 bigger than us and consequently — that isto say— we were not afraid Ob ho but we— in fact we hadn’t time) : ! PORTABLE HARRASING Acknowledged the brightest cheapest and safest light in existence Your house can be lighted with a brilliancy equalling the hydrogen gas at an expense of one cent ail hour A metalic lamp the only absolutely safe one in existence — no smoke-- no smell-- no chimney— no wick— no from the lamp nor your wife on explosion account of the cleaning and trimming Go for it at T & W Taylors’ One of the express companies was placed in charge of a box a few days since marked as follows: This package contains a duck of a bonnet Expressman I pray you place nothing upon it: Tis made of a ribbon a straw and a feather John-Browne- d The whole with a - City Jan? 25th 1871 v: ' 'Affectionate U No Hoo: — A short visit to the land of Saxey Jbrot me face to face with our mutual friend ‘Perry Nebeker ' Esq ‘He 'condescendingly made me the bearer to you of a very important verbal dispatch which rah about as follows: “Tell U No” Hoo that the people of Laketown have been very successful pi and that if he declined raising pop-coi- n becoming a resident from fears that popcorn cannot' be rownhere lie may at once dismiss his virgin apprehensions” He! inferentially desired U No ‘Hoo to further learn that the matrimonial alliance which had been happily ‘consummated1 between the 'houses of Nebeker and 'McKean had Materially added pounds several to his ‘personal weight and ex- -' an opinion that if the house of pressed ” U No Hoo: would form' a similar alliance 'with some honorable house no doubt the same promising results would follow' So far as'I learned the healths of the monster': the stickers Saxey and your subscribers were quite other numerous ii ' "i ” 7 '' ’“good With sentiments 'of profound regard r and renewed ‘assurances : of increasing es- ' teem which 'continues! to accumulate ‘until ' ’its' superincumbent ponderosity threatens to crush rue I! beg tb remain! my very dear U No Hoo Yours from the ground up A MM J ’ r p ‘r " V delighted: to hear definite 'intelligence in regard to the "welfare11 of 'Saxey and’the monster “(No! ' ' A ' 11 l" r'i ri In regard to pur : illusion to Perry house forming au alliance we would like to ! t ' y t fastened postage-stam- p gether Its owner a damsel is to- youthful and fain But like Flora McFllmsey has nothing to wear Beware then Expressman! I warn you take heed And forward this bonnet with care and with !i j We are 'intensely GAS The greatest invention of the agC I A complete gas factory which can be carried about in the vest pocket ’ speed” “It's no use giving me any more of that 11 New Move11 medicine ! It don7 1 stay on fulvrvttermmU my stomach five minutes!” CHOICE POULTRY I now annexed AM Pure-Bre- HEARTLESS booking First-Cla- ss prices We met a1 gentleman-othe street the other day who informed lis that he was naturally very hold and courageous said he had traveled a good deal in the wilds of the Great West and it1 had been his fortune to pass through "many- scenes of peril and difficulty he: had encountered the fierce Digger Indian who pomatums his head with mud and parts the hair with a hatchet the mammoth grizzly of the Sierra Nevada the ferocious m pun tain lion 'and the fierce and blood thirsty cata- - ' mount 'He had met them all face to face with a steady nerve and an even pulse-- re fact had1 never been badly scared until he saw a woman with short hair We never remember having heard such a savage remark about The fair s&st7 in the nd we merely whole course of our life publish 'It’- - to show1’ to what ’shameless — lengths some men will go Sliort hair indeed I' It’s a wonder the wretch is not afraid 'to' walk the streets after making1 such ri heartless remark ‘ ' d i ' : orders for Eggs from POULTRY at the Light Brahmas or Leghorns £400 per floz Black Spanish or Dominiques £300 Black Javas 500 - 600 Houdans These Birds have no superiors in Utahu Orders must be accompanied with the cash and Will be filled in rotation ' T Address aU orders C R SAVAGE Salt Lake City Utah Member of the Parent LSociety Tor Improvement of Stock YOIJ No 1 GO STRAIGHT TO MICHAEL on 3d South Street and get you A suit of clothes you need it and monev is no object with him— that is he don’t object to the money A TTENTION UNIVERSE ! BY n Kingdoms! On TIIE your left wheel into Kelsons Golden Gate where large stores of Kandy Ivakes Krakers and Konfectionery are piled un till you kant rest ALMOST ASSASSIXATED GENTLE3IAX was' recently enticed into a house on Main St when a cloth was thrown over him and a powerful man seized liim and cut every vestige of hair off his ’face - Look out for them at SquiresV It’s Barber-u- s A FTP YOrWAXTYOERPFilTPTAKEX r1 with a high forehead and smiling go ' to Savage and Ottinger ' t (T3 0 'i"1 sKKim: famimes happy of Bears Foxes Chiota and Badger Monkeys parrots Blue Jays Babbits and Porcupines at the Museum and Menagerie 111 |